redneck bidet

After plunging for several minutes, when the water turns a consistent brown with shreds of toilet paper surfacing consistently, you will feel the pressure drop in your hand(s). At that moment sit down and flush again.
Sorry I got your floor all wet in there but the almighty gave me a redneck bidet before I started to stucco
by Assquatch May 06, 2022
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Gold Bidet

The act of using one's urine stream to rinse unwanted fecal matter off one's buttocks and anal region and after defecating.
There was no toilet paper so I had to give myself a Gold Bidet.
by BidenSniffsKids February 10, 2021
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american bidet

Taking a shit and then hopping in the shower and using the shower to clean off your butthole, preferably with a jet setting.
Yeah, toilet paper is a scam. I just hop in the shower and do the ol' american bidet and then use a little soap.
by Jobungus October 04, 2023
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American Bidet

The act of shitting in your side-loading washing machine, then using it to clean yourself.
Theres a line for the bathroom, I guess it's time for an American bidet.
by Mjku December 22, 2014
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american bidet

Getting a dog to lick ones butthole after going number two.
My colleague Josh trained his labrador to give him an American bidet--- god damn, you should see how happy the dog is afterwards.
by Khalfani Lisimba November 06, 2017
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Appalachian bidet

When you have run out of toilet paper and you call your cousin Cletus or equivalent to come and do you a solid and use his stream of urine to clean your chocolate covered starfish.
“Yeah I ran out of toilet paper and I had to give my cousin a call to come and give me an Appalachian bidet to get clean.”
by Loganjaman August 16, 2023
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Skibidi Bidet

A version of the popular meme among mostly gen alpha "skibidi toilet" except it sprays water at you
Brr skibidi Bidet Bidet Bidet Bidet Bidet Bidet yes yes
im so sorry for writing that
by iminhellplshelpahhh July 04, 2024
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