Brazilian Boner Spider 

Also known as the Brazilian Wandering Spider, this bad-ass spider is from Brazil. If this guy bites you, your dick is going to be harder than cold steel for, like, eight hours. So much so, that it might rip the skin.

After being bitten and experiencing the aformentioned rock-solid 8-hour bone, one may die or at least experience impotence for life.

The only cure to this impotence is another bite from the boner spider! Once again, this may cause death, but you will also experience a wild, 8-hour boner.

"So I went to Brazil, and met this chick at Carnivale, but I was so drunk that I couldn't get it up. Then, this spider bit me. I think it was called the Brazilian Boner Spider. Anyway, we got it on for like 8 hours. It hurt a lot, but you know what they say: when in Rome. After we finished, she left and I almost died. After 6 weeks in a dirty Brazilian hospital, I was finally able to come home. Now I can't get a boner any more. I'm thinking about buying one of those spiders and have it bite my dick every time I'm ready to get it on."

Brazilian Boner Spider by boner_enthusiast February 20, 2012

I have boner

"I have boner," is a wonderful ice breaker with really hot chicks.

Usually results in fairly quick hot monkey sex.

"I have boner," Louie said to the unbelievably gorgeous hot chick standing next to him at the bar.

"My place is just around the corner," replied the stunner, "let's go boink our brains out."

I have boner by scodder May 19, 2010

dental boner 

Sexual arousal brought about by close proximity of tempting and seductive body parts of dentists and hygienists of opposite sex, combined with their intent focus on your face. This sometimes involves beautiful eyes, face, and low-cut scrubs showing some breasts or chest area as the dentist or hygienist leans over you and stares at you with focus.

I had a dental boner for all of forty five minutes it took the new Eastern European dental hygienist to clean my teeth.

dental boner by Sombrerio August 16, 2011

beef boner 

1. a butcher or meatcutter; a member of the Beef Boners union.

2. an erect penis.

1. My father is a proud beef boner.

2. My father has a proud beef boner.

beef boner by Joe Bone March 22, 2005

Anti-boner 

1. The act of stopping a male erection dead in its tracks.

2. Any event so shocking it causes a boner to instantly die

3. Used to describe the ugliest of women

"I was so drunk I almost fucked Joknisha last night, but even alcohol couldn't mask the smell of that vag."
"Ahhhh, that shit is the anti-boner"


"I heard horse faced Gina started to grow a mustache."
"That girls smile is the anti-boner."

"The other day I was making out with my girlfriend, and her grandma walked in with her top off... instant anti-boner for life."

Anti-boner by Dtron 3000 March 5, 2009

illegal boner 

A boner you get from looking at an under-age girl.

I was watching Full House when all of the sudden Michelle Tanner gave me an illegal boner.

illegal boner by MR BOYER March 12, 2009

Rocket Boner 

An intense and quickly raised boner that is often brought on by a pretty girl talking dirty. This is possible over any internet communication or any other type of communication that does not involve face to face contact. Rocket boners could lead to pre-ejaculation. Also used to refer to dog boners.

As Rachel spoke dirty into the Xbox Live mic, Zach got a rocket boner and Tony pre-ejaculated.

Rocket Boner by heroicgroupofpeople July 2, 2011