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sit on a ham sandwich with mustard!

Only used in the direst of situations, when an extremely rude person is relentlessly insulting you. It is both a powerful offense and defense.
Tommy:'Did you hear what Sarah told Bob? She told him to sit on a ham sandwich with mustard!'
Jessica:'What happened to him?'
Tommy:'His eyes rolled back in his head, his blood fizzed and boiled, and his spine slid out of his anus!'
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Spear some Ham

Taking the least possible amount of effort to fool an idiot.
They wouldn't let me in without a badge, so I had to spear some ham by making a fake from an old cereal box, and it actually worked. -Reddit user SuperFLEB
by KristinaKrnkDat July 25, 2018
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Related Words
ham Hamza hamster hammers hamilton hamish hamburger Hammertime hammy Hammerhead

Hung like a Ham

When you are so fucking hungover you are unable to talk....and unable to walk.
Johnny didn’t make it to class today because he was Hung like a Ham
by Saucybastard November 28, 2018
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slap some ham on it

If theres a problem in any way shape or form you just slap some ham on it. That's all you need to do. Problem Solved.
Man 1:Dude, I'm failing all of my classes right now and i just dont know what to do to fix my grades.

Man 2:Hey, just slap some ham on it.
by TheGa1eFund February 1, 2019
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Tossed the ham

When you finally leave something or someone you realized was complete trash.
1. My job f*cking sucked so I finally tossed the ham.
2. My ex was ugly and smelt bad so I tossed the ham..
by Jillpill March 30, 2019
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don't get your ham in a twist

this is a ruder version of:
don't get your knickers in a twist

but it literally means - don't get your fanny in a twist

it can also refer to ugly vaginas that appear "twisted" , telling a woman that she has a twisted ham can mean that they have a gross or ugly vagina or it can mean that they are unfeminine. Telling a man he has a twisted ham means that he is too feminine and or a male prostitute which would mean that his asshole has stretched out so much that it looks like an ugly vagina.
both person 1 and 2 are arguing
person1- * arguing and being a cunt*
person2- ' don't get your ham in a twist '
by nishishishi June 9, 2019
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easy baked ham

idk but i’m finna turn u into one
“if u don’t stop i will turn u into an easy baked ham” - stupid freshman boi
by wdw.marais. January 1, 2020
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