jesus sandles

the fugliest shoe ever made. they look like something i wore to the zoo when i was six.

I was digging around in the dumpster and found these jesus sandles.

by prepercolate May 24, 2013

zombie jesus

Just plain jesus after he rose from the dead.

Mary Magdelane - Holy jesusfuckshits it's zombie jesus.
Romans - Get him!!!
Jesus - Later fools, he rises to heaven while saluting earth with a heavenly su-fi.

by suede1976 December 14, 2008

jesus poop

perfect poop that doesn't leave cling-ons and yet cleanses your colon; the kind of poop you pray for when in a public bathroom - easy, no straining, and no mess

"I eat Activia (tm) once a day so that I know I'm gonna have jesus poops! Spares me embarrassment, man."

by Jumping for Jesus November 24, 2007

jesus tits

The best damn tits there are

by Mike Truitt August 6, 2003

Jesus Christmas

Jesus Christ for those hardcore catholics/christians who have NO BALLS and will not seriously take the lords name in vain

"Jesus Christmas i dropped my fone in the pool"

by jess hanch & nikkii rodrigues July 3, 2008

Jesus Horse

noun; commonly referred to as "Jesus Horses" by the duo Armstrong and Getty @AandGShow

noun; anything large and fun to ride that terrifies others, such as an SUV

noun; dinosaur

"Did you see that Jesus Horse, it was huge!"

"That's like saying Jesus Horses don't exist... what else can't we teach!"

by echodanny August 14, 2012

Jesus Jizzer

Religion-crazy believers, usually Christians. Those who can never shut up about how "great he is" and how everybody will go to hell who do not practically come about the Christian religion.

When one of our highly religious friends randomly start up an annoying, uncomfortable conversation of "how great church was last night" and how "my life was enriched by the holy saviour" ... by now Nic* & I just go: "dude, we don't jizz for jesus."
Henceforth, a Jesus Jizzer is the exaggerated word for jesus lover. It's like the Christian exaggeration for the word atheist is Devil Worshipper.
:P simple as that

by Zombie Apocalypse ;O March 21, 2011