by CDlustscats February 15, 2010
Get the Twilight Twat mug.A book written by Stephane Meyer that features a girl named Bella Swann and a 108 year old vampire named Edward. Being the new girl in high school, she completely falls in love with him, and being a vampire, he has to resist drinking her blood because she smells so damn good. At first he warns Bella about his dangerousness, but then succumbs to his love for her and he and his vampire family protects her from these tracker vampires who want to kill her.
Well, isn't that the most retarded piece of shit I've read. I honestly can't believe people consider this good literature. The author describes Edward more times than you can talk words in a minute and the saddest thing about it that it is a best seller. Twilight is not deep, its not philosophical and it sure as hell not fucking romanace with its 2-dimensional, half assed crap. This being compared to Harry Potter is incredible, since JK Rowling actually put CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT and PLOT in the fucking story. The author contridicts her own canon to fit Bella. It saddens me how Americans think this is so good.
Too many people take it seriously because its so dark and amazing. The characters are shit with the exception of Jasper and Alice, the only two interesting characters in there who are completely overshadowed by Edward and Bella's romance.
Oh and by the way, vampires sparkle. IN sunlight. They don't burn. Oh great.
Well, isn't that the most retarded piece of shit I've read. I honestly can't believe people consider this good literature. The author describes Edward more times than you can talk words in a minute and the saddest thing about it that it is a best seller. Twilight is not deep, its not philosophical and it sure as hell not fucking romanace with its 2-dimensional, half assed crap. This being compared to Harry Potter is incredible, since JK Rowling actually put CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT and PLOT in the fucking story. The author contridicts her own canon to fit Bella. It saddens me how Americans think this is so good.
Too many people take it seriously because its so dark and amazing. The characters are shit with the exception of Jasper and Alice, the only two interesting characters in there who are completely overshadowed by Edward and Bella's romance.
Oh and by the way, vampires sparkle. IN sunlight. They don't burn. Oh great.
Bella from Twilight able to control herself when she was a newborn but Jasper couldn't? He won't stand for this mind-fuckery.
by Fairy-Peacock April 26, 2009
Get the Twilight mug.Related Words
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• twilingual
• twilight
• Twilight saga
• twilight zone
• Twilighter
• Twilighting
• twining
• twirling
• Twixing
by BSer95 March 24, 2009
Get the Twilight mug.Probably the worst series of books,
that later turned into one of the worst movie, ever created.
The story revolves around the protagonist Bella Swan, who is the average every day MaryJane new girl in town, with not-so-special looks, and personality.
But dispite all of that, the most inhumanely gorgeous boy, Edward Cullen, catches interest in her. That is just one of the many cliches displayed in this book.
Another being that he is a vampire who thirsts the most for Bella's blood, yet ironically loves her.
Woah, no one saw any of this coming. I could hardly stomache reading it. Every other sentance is describing Edward's perfect face, and body, and whatever, which leads me to believe Stephenie Meyer has some severe issues living in a sad fantasy to escape the reality she didn't marry someone like that.
Though I did not read the last one, I was told Edward and Bella have sex and produce some kind of mutant half vampire half human offspring. Which furthers Stephenie's perversions. It's a teen book for god's sake, keep that shit to yourself.
The fact that the book is about an average everyday girl like most of us, who finds the perfect boy is the perfect ploy to bring in naive lonely tween girls to purchase this horrible cliche book.
Though dispite how truely awful, and lacking in any literary devices it is, it was turned into a movie. Which proved that the movie industry has gone to shit.
The acting was nothing special, and the scenes moved so fast it seemed unreal. One scene they hate eachother, and the next they're in love. And it is not real love, it is based on shallow, looks-based feelings. But, it was a movie about Twilight, so I expected as much.
For some reason, girls, housewives, and even some boys seem to be obsessed with the book and the sweet things Edward says.
I think people need to get across that it is a BOOK. Therefore Edward will say the right things at the right time. And for that matter, Edward is a figment of Stephenie Meyer's mind. So anything he says is what SHE has made up. If you are "so so so in love with Edward" Then you really feel so about the author.
Fuck this book, and fuck everyone who loves it so much.
that later turned into one of the worst movie, ever created.
The story revolves around the protagonist Bella Swan, who is the average every day MaryJane new girl in town, with not-so-special looks, and personality.
But dispite all of that, the most inhumanely gorgeous boy, Edward Cullen, catches interest in her. That is just one of the many cliches displayed in this book.
Another being that he is a vampire who thirsts the most for Bella's blood, yet ironically loves her.
Woah, no one saw any of this coming. I could hardly stomache reading it. Every other sentance is describing Edward's perfect face, and body, and whatever, which leads me to believe Stephenie Meyer has some severe issues living in a sad fantasy to escape the reality she didn't marry someone like that.
Though I did not read the last one, I was told Edward and Bella have sex and produce some kind of mutant half vampire half human offspring. Which furthers Stephenie's perversions. It's a teen book for god's sake, keep that shit to yourself.
The fact that the book is about an average everyday girl like most of us, who finds the perfect boy is the perfect ploy to bring in naive lonely tween girls to purchase this horrible cliche book.
Though dispite how truely awful, and lacking in any literary devices it is, it was turned into a movie. Which proved that the movie industry has gone to shit.
The acting was nothing special, and the scenes moved so fast it seemed unreal. One scene they hate eachother, and the next they're in love. And it is not real love, it is based on shallow, looks-based feelings. But, it was a movie about Twilight, so I expected as much.
For some reason, girls, housewives, and even some boys seem to be obsessed with the book and the sweet things Edward says.
I think people need to get across that it is a BOOK. Therefore Edward will say the right things at the right time. And for that matter, Edward is a figment of Stephenie Meyer's mind. So anything he says is what SHE has made up. If you are "so so so in love with Edward" Then you really feel so about the author.
Fuck this book, and fuck everyone who loves it so much.
Twilight is the epitomey of shit.
by hheartbreak January 31, 2009
Get the Twilight mug.A plot used by the book companies to assassinate the new president.
Phase 1: The book companies hire a author to write a book that will give fat chicks hope that a vampire will stumble upon them and fall in love with them. It makes since seeing as how, with a few exceptions, fat chicks are reading the books.
Phase 2: They make a movie, the fat chicks go to the movie and spend an assload on snacks.
Phase 3:The movie theaters send the snack money back to the Book companies who then hire a gunman.
Phase 4: Dead president...while its still unclear as to why there doing this it is a threat we must all face.
Phase 1: The book companies hire a author to write a book that will give fat chicks hope that a vampire will stumble upon them and fall in love with them. It makes since seeing as how, with a few exceptions, fat chicks are reading the books.
Phase 2: They make a movie, the fat chicks go to the movie and spend an assload on snacks.
Phase 3:The movie theaters send the snack money back to the Book companies who then hire a gunman.
Phase 4: Dead president...while its still unclear as to why there doing this it is a threat we must all face.
by Alix McQ December 16, 2008
Get the Twilight mug.Quite possibly the greatest game ever made. A zelda game which has realistic graphics and doesn't have the horrible cel-shaded graphics of wind-waker. There is a new set of items featuring:
The Slingshot- A basic aiming device that helps you learn the basics for the wii version. Allows you to knock down bees' nests.
The Fishing Rod- Allows Link to catch fish. Different baits are needed to catch different fish.
The Gale Boomerang- A boomerang which creates a tornado used for turning windmills and bringing objects to you.
The Iron Boots- Boots which make you heavier and let you walk on green glowing areas on the ceiling. They also let you pull heavy walls, beat people in sumo wrestling games, and sink in water
The Hero's Bow- A bow that shoots arrows to hurt enemies more than the slingshot, can be combined with any type of bomb to make bomb arrows, and can be combined with the Hawkeye to have a sniper rifle effect.
The Hawkeye- A mask that allows you to see far-away things in a sniper scope mode. Can be combined with the bow to shoot far away things.
The Bombs- 1. Normal bombs are used to destroy boulders. 2. Water bombs are used to destroy boulders under water. 3. Bomblings are bombs that run off when you put them down. They can all be combined with the bow to shoot far-away things.
The Clawshot- See hookshot Later upgrades to two clawshots so you can move easily along walls.
The Spinner- A gyroscope (top) that Link stands on to glide over quicksand and grind wall rails.
The Ball and Chain- A massive steel ball and chain mace used to break ice and cause massive damage.
The Dominion Rod- A rod which allows you to take control of some statues. Pressing the dominion rod's button while it is set will make the statue attack.
The Horse Call- An item used to call your horse any time.
The Double Clawshots- Two Clawshots
It also comes with a new set of Tunics
The Farm Clothes- Patched up farm clothes he wears at the beginning of the game, before gathering the tears of light for the first light spirit.
The Green Tunic- The classic green tunic from the Zelda games.
The Zora Armor- Blue chain mail armor with headgear used to breathe underwater and swim freely through it.
The Magic Armor- Armor that takes up rupees when worn. When it, you will lose rupees instead of health. If out of rupees it slows you down like you are wearing Iron boots.
In this game, Link can turn into a wolf when he enters the twilight realm. On his back rides a female imp named Midna.
She asks him to gather the "fused shadows" from the temples' bosses so she can defeat the evil king "Zant". After gathering them, Zant steals them and you have to gather the pieces of the "Mirror of Twilight" so she can defeat him.
In this game, your horse can have its name be whatever you want it to be. It also only comes whenever you blow on a reed or use the horse call item.
Link has a wider set of moves to fight with now. He first off has more normal sword techniques than any Link before him. At least 20 of them. Later in the game he can learn more attacks from a golden wolf. It attacks him and he warps to a sky temple, where he is taught techniques by a talking skeleton. He can learn 7 extra attacks in total. Such as the Shield attack or the Mortal draw.
There are 6 temples. They are of the elements grass,fire,water,sand,ice,and sky. That is the order in which they occur.
Overall this game gets a 10/10. It's only flaws are small inconveniences that hardly ever happen.
The Slingshot- A basic aiming device that helps you learn the basics for the wii version. Allows you to knock down bees' nests.
The Fishing Rod- Allows Link to catch fish. Different baits are needed to catch different fish.
The Gale Boomerang- A boomerang which creates a tornado used for turning windmills and bringing objects to you.
The Iron Boots- Boots which make you heavier and let you walk on green glowing areas on the ceiling. They also let you pull heavy walls, beat people in sumo wrestling games, and sink in water
The Hero's Bow- A bow that shoots arrows to hurt enemies more than the slingshot, can be combined with any type of bomb to make bomb arrows, and can be combined with the Hawkeye to have a sniper rifle effect.
The Hawkeye- A mask that allows you to see far-away things in a sniper scope mode. Can be combined with the bow to shoot far away things.
The Bombs- 1. Normal bombs are used to destroy boulders. 2. Water bombs are used to destroy boulders under water. 3. Bomblings are bombs that run off when you put them down. They can all be combined with the bow to shoot far-away things.
The Clawshot- See hookshot Later upgrades to two clawshots so you can move easily along walls.
The Spinner- A gyroscope (top) that Link stands on to glide over quicksand and grind wall rails.
The Ball and Chain- A massive steel ball and chain mace used to break ice and cause massive damage.
The Dominion Rod- A rod which allows you to take control of some statues. Pressing the dominion rod's button while it is set will make the statue attack.
The Horse Call- An item used to call your horse any time.
The Double Clawshots- Two Clawshots
It also comes with a new set of Tunics
The Farm Clothes- Patched up farm clothes he wears at the beginning of the game, before gathering the tears of light for the first light spirit.
The Green Tunic- The classic green tunic from the Zelda games.
The Zora Armor- Blue chain mail armor with headgear used to breathe underwater and swim freely through it.
The Magic Armor- Armor that takes up rupees when worn. When it, you will lose rupees instead of health. If out of rupees it slows you down like you are wearing Iron boots.
In this game, Link can turn into a wolf when he enters the twilight realm. On his back rides a female imp named Midna.
She asks him to gather the "fused shadows" from the temples' bosses so she can defeat the evil king "Zant". After gathering them, Zant steals them and you have to gather the pieces of the "Mirror of Twilight" so she can defeat him.
In this game, your horse can have its name be whatever you want it to be. It also only comes whenever you blow on a reed or use the horse call item.
Link has a wider set of moves to fight with now. He first off has more normal sword techniques than any Link before him. At least 20 of them. Later in the game he can learn more attacks from a golden wolf. It attacks him and he warps to a sky temple, where he is taught techniques by a talking skeleton. He can learn 7 extra attacks in total. Such as the Shield attack or the Mortal draw.
There are 6 temples. They are of the elements grass,fire,water,sand,ice,and sky. That is the order in which they occur.
Overall this game gets a 10/10. It's only flaws are small inconveniences that hardly ever happen.
by Keres December 14, 2008
Get the twilight princess mug.The 16 to 18 year old girl or gay man who had no idea what Twilight was until they saw the big hype over the upcoming movie.
The person generally went to go see the midnight showing of the movie without reading the books, and the next day went to the mall to buy half off Twilight apparel at 'Hot Topic.'
After these events, the person will go to 'Barnes and Noble' purchase a cappuccino, buy the twilight books, carry them around their high school, and pretend they are a vampire.
The person generally went to go see the midnight showing of the movie without reading the books, and the next day went to the mall to buy half off Twilight apparel at 'Hot Topic.'
After these events, the person will go to 'Barnes and Noble' purchase a cappuccino, buy the twilight books, carry them around their high school, and pretend they are a vampire.
"Hey John, do you see Jenni over there with her brand new Twilight books?"
"Yeah, they still have the price sticker on them, what a 'Twilight Tool'"
"Yeah, they still have the price sticker on them, what a 'Twilight Tool'"
by Zachary M. McComb January 22, 2009
Get the Twilight Tool mug.