Hard on theory

According to hard on theory men were the first to wear clothes.
In prehistoric times the headman would see a guy and think" that guy's got a hard on. He must be thinking about fucking my woman. I will kill him!".
So one day a guy got to thinkink" A lot of guys have been killed for thinking about fucking the headman's woman. How can a stop that from happening to me? I know I will cover up my pecker with animal skin and that way he can't tell when i'm thinking about fucking his woman. I will call it clothes".

Did you know that hard on theory says men were the first to wear clothes?

by Deep Blue 2012 August 10, 2009

Hard Nipple-Tightis

When you grow a pimple like bump inside your nipple or your nipple just becomes hard.

I've come down with a case of Hard Nipple-Tightis

by Matt January 24, 2004

Go Hard in the Motherfucking Paint

To pile at least 4 people into a basement bathroom, then proceed to smoke copious amounts of Marijuana using a vaporizer with the door closed, the fan on, the lights off, a strobe light flashing, and rave music plays on a nearby boombox/ghetto blaster.

Maria: "Hey, did you guys go hard in the motherfucking paint last weekend?"

Colin: "No, we couldn't. Nobody had a free bathroom for the night."

by SpudHawk August 14, 2012

suck hard like the starting line

something or someone that doesn't really suck too bad, but you like to pretend does.

Gib sucks hard like the starting line.

by Oprah Noodlemantra March 13, 2004

go hard in the crayons

Similar to going hard in the paint, going hard in the crayons is going just a little bit harder, as if to say one has been going hard since they used Crayolas in Preschool.

"Man I went way too hard today. I'm way past paint, I go hard in the crayons now"

by acarnz April 27, 2012

Hard Boiled Titties

1. You have a lot of titty stamina and your titties can take a beating

2. they are excellent for titty sex

1. Damn that girl had some hard boiled titties!!!

2. I love me some good hard boiled titties from time to time.

by Jajoe February 10, 2010

go hard in the paint

To pop a boner and stick it into a can of paint.

Joe: I go hard in the paint every night dude
Matt: Like, you played basketball?
Joe: Uhh...

by jaguaro March 6, 2014