divorce bike

(n.) A ridiculously expensive bicycle which precipitates, or otherwise denotes, the dissolution of a marriage.

"This carbon fibre Pinarello is incredible, a real divorce bike."

"She told me it's over. Guess it's time for the divorce bike."

by Zack J. June 2, 2016

Divorce vows

The vows the divorcing couple make to each other with hopes of a cordial post-marriage relationship. Awash in disillusion, not unlike with marriage vows, the couple untying the knot make promises of paying child support regularly, not switching weekends without notice, embracing new spouses, etc.

The divorce vows Rick and Cindy made to each other lasted about 3 months, approximately the same time as marriage vows last before disintegrating into reality.

by Grant Rampus February 7, 2021

Divorce Present

Like a push present. Except you buy something for yourself to celebrate your new found independence.

Check out my new car! It's my divorce present.

by Kitty kitty lol lol February 22, 2021

Workplace Divorce

When you resign and your workplace takes it so badly they obsess with punishing you forever and make it their mission to ruin you life.

Most commonly occurs narcissists and sociopaths are in charge.

My workplace divorce wasn’t mutual, they still think I can’t live without them and want half of everything!

by Between You & Me March 5, 2021

divorce-stifle

a divorced person who uses their divorce as an excuse to stay stagnant in life. Blames a divorce on all their unhappiness and miss-fortune.

to suppress, or have difficulty from moving beyond a divorce.

My mom is divorce-stifled and has not seemed happy for the last 25 years.

by Kate Jimenez November 15, 2011

Divorce Lottery

When your wife divorces you and collects a compilation of checks including:

1. Alimony

2. Child Support

3. Deed to Your House

4. Your Car Title

"The lottery your man can't win"

"She married and divorced me, just so she could play Divorce Lottery and win"

by Ride or Die Hubby Nigga January 2, 2020

Divorce Shower

A celebration of freedom and independence when ending a marriage or long term relationship.

Me and the boys are throwing divorce showers all summer long.

by Buddhaenamored June 7, 2020