Sitting on the computer for an hour

what dad's say you have been doing when it really has been one minute

Me: I am going to play the computer
Mom: okay
Dad: *gets home from work
also dad: *instantly yells swears at me about how i have been sitting on the computer for an hour until I cry.

by Dramat1c November 2, 2020

24/7 on computer

When you are always on your computer every day 24/7
This is a condition that occurs the most if your a:
Redditor
Twitter user
Youtube watcher
Urban dictionary reader
Netflix watcher
Xfinity watcher

Guy 1: That guy has been 24/7 on computer
Guy 2: Oh man, his eyes are going to be fucked soon.

by ‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎ May 17, 2021

B-tec Computer

A computer that barely functions and doesnt run any games whatsoever.

-Bro what the hell is wrong your PC
-Yeah I know its B-Tec computer...

by Kasablanco Maroko November 23, 2022

Must have been a computer-glitch

A modern-day "get-out-of-dutch" statement dat is da standard --- and generally untruthful --- response when someone indignantly inquires why he was overcharged/invalidly billed, needlessly disturbed, wrongfully detained, etc., when he had specifically taken careful steps to ensure dat he would not have any problems in said area of his life.

If someone in authority tells you, "Sorry -- must have been a computer-glitch" or, "I dunno --- must have been an accounting error" in response to your resentfully asking him why you were incorrectly bothered, you should strongly suspect dat this response is merely a standard "canned answer" dat he gives to every protesting citizen whom he and/or da organization dat he represents investigates/contacts in error; in reality, off course, it's probably intentionally being done in da hopes dat they can gain unearned/undeserved monetary benefits, give themselves a fatter workload so dat they look busier than they actually are, drum up more business, etc.

by QuacksO March 2, 2023

hmm oh nice computer you got there can i have it

if you hear this on your comuter then i hope your computer isnt hacked

Computer:hmm oh nice computer you got there can i have it
Person:Wait a minu-
(blue screen appears on computer)

by KonHon May 7, 2023

Aperture Science Computer-Aided Enrichment Center

In the portal games the Aperture Science Computer-Aided Enrichment Center is a large area in the Aperture Science facility in which many main test chambers are located, and where most of the testing involving portal guns and such takes place. Chell wakes up here in the first portal game.

“Hello, and, again, welcome to the Aperture Science Computer-Aided Enrichment Center. We hope your brief detention in the Relaxation Vault has been a pleasant one.

Your specimen has been processed and we are now ready to begin the test proper. Before we start, however, keep in mind that although fun and learning are the primary goals of all Enrichment Center activities, serious injuries may occur.

For your own safety, and the safety of others, please refrain from touching bzzzzzt

Por favor bordon de fallar Muchos gracias de fallar gracias

stand back. The portal will open in three. Two. One.”

by Hitmantheman January 31, 2024

Spacetime Crystals Computing

A proposed computational paradigm where information is encoded not in static bits, but in the temporal phase relationships of spacetime crystals. Computation becomes a dance of cycles: logic gates are implemented by interfering the periodic outputs of multiple crystals; memory is stored in persistent, repeating states; processing occurs through the evolution of temporal lattice patterns. This promises inherently fault-tolerant, low-energy computing, as the crystal's dynamics are topologically protected from perturbation.

Spacetime Crystals Computing *Example: In a spacetime crystal computer, the number 42 isn't stored as a voltage in a flip-flop. It's encoded in the relative phase shift between two eternally oscillating time crystals. An addition operation is performed by entangling their temporal lattices, causing a predictable phase shift proportional to the sum. The calculation is not a discrete event; it's an ongoing, parallel property of the crystalline time order.*

by Dumu The Void February 11, 2026