Bollocky Wank Shite 

The flavor of artichoke and beet root soup.

I want fish and chips! This soup tastes like bollocky wank shite!

Bollocky Wank Shite by Slugger11 March 14, 2011

wank plank 

A piece of wood that you put up against your door handle to stop anyone coming in your room.

hey whats he doing with that plank of wood
i think he's gona use it to stop anybody going into his room whiles he's doing stuff, he calls it his wank plank

wank plank by dec457 April 24, 2011

Wacky Hijinks 

A term that is generally used to describe children's movies that rely on slapstick or lowbrow humor instead of a plot, if even one intended for children. Examples include fart jokes, bumbling bad guys, gratuitous nut shots and extreme overacting to play up any of the above.

That "family" movie was nothing but childish wacky hijinks.

Wacky Hijinks by MushroomBrew April 1, 2019

Eskimo Wank 

The act of placing your hand in a freezer for an extended period of time and then proceeding to masturbate. Often used by Alex Birtwistle..

Alex: I really fancy having an eskimo wank tonight, but the freezer is broken.
*Alex cries*|

Eskimo Wank by Penthouse9 February 14, 2015

Maintenance Wank

When you're participating in nofap and you begin to over sexualise things, like apple pies and peanut butter sandwhiches, it's time for a maintenance wank. This keeps your inner sexual deviant at bay, while also reducing the amount of awkward boners you might experience.

Guy 1: "I keep getting stiffies when I see anything that vaguely resembles titties or a vagina, it's killing me."
Guy 2: "Mate, it's time for a maintenance wank. If you don't let off some pressure, your dick is going to take over."

Maintenance Wank by Zima69err July 13, 2016

mirror wank 

pleasing yourself infront of the mirror (sexually) often for the benefit of yourself and sometimes others. people have the incentive to carry out a mirror wank because they find themself aesthetically pleasing. however it is advised not to do this infront of crazy mirrors as this could cause a false sense of confidence or a feeling of belittlement depending on the convexity of the mirror.

'hey bro, i just had an awesome mirror wank'
'gnarley'

mirror wank by joshco95 November 11, 2013

Reality wank 

A masturbatory fantasy about a celebrity you could probably shag in real life such as any of the actresses from " Hollyoaks "

Oh Gladys dont wait up for me I'm off for a reality wank

Reality wank by Leeny Burghers April 4, 2003