Jared

An annoying asshole. He doesn't get laid and gets sucked off by men named Kohjiro. A person that says he is down to fuck his cousins and has a micro peen.

Jared is an ugly bastard, and he ate Kohjiros asshole when they had a sleepover in a cardboard box on the street.

by eufefuefueeunfeufneufneuf November 28, 2021

Jared

The biggest piece of bird shit out there. If you meet him, stay far away for your own safety.

Me:oh god its Jared
Jared:Hi
Me:Explodes*

by imRaymondg February 25, 2020

Jared

A white prick who doesn’t give a shit

There’s that jared duce prick again

by Gswee ofshados October 18, 2018

Jared

Jared is obsessed with bath bombs and eats them

Jared: *Licks bath bomb* This is some tasty ass shit

by EvanHandSoap August 13, 2018

Jared

A fatass dick sucking nigga who loves to eat

Omg Jared sucked his dick behind the dumpster

by Jared stock April 3, 2017

Jared

Noun: a person or people with the name Jared varying from short to tell hot and ugly straight and gay no real way to describe a Jared but weird

Guy: "I heard Jared hit his head on the ceiling while jumping"
Girl:"that's Jared alright"

by the real J July 22, 2011

Jared

Slang for a child molester. Came from Jared Fogle, that subway guy who ended up being a pedophile.

"Hey man, did you hear about that dude?"
"Yeah dude, he was a Jared."

by georgiasmalls April 20, 2016