Consult Professor Hans Jerkov

To wank

When I'm got getting any, I consult Professor Hans Jerkov

by Dollarbill85 September 1, 2010

jerkolater

The act of receiving a ferocious handjob preferably with lotion while taping the end of the penis shut with duct tape (must be secured very tightly) until ejaculation has been reached. Pause for 1 minute and watch as the goo oozes out.

While moving some boxes, Kelly decided to give me a jerkolater with grape jelly and and some packing tape.

by Raw_dogging_and_bailing July 12, 2006

jerkability

a rating of how sexy (or appealing to masturbate to) is,
ratings go from 1 to 10,
1 being E.T. wearing nothing but a sombrero and a strap-on,
10 being Angelina Jolie 20 years ago

Adam: Dude, did you see the Grammy awards last night?

Josh: Heck yes! Megan Fox was so hot!!

Adam: Dude...you're stupid, she's only like a 6 on the jerkability scale.

Josh:wut?

Adam: Her thumbs look like big toes...

by Beat Off Ben, AKA Ben K. May 6, 2011

Jerkbait

Somebody who is a (common) target for furious masturbation fantasies. often used as an insult.

"Shut up, Jerkbait."

by B@byQu33$H December 14, 2016

Jerkout

Excessive or prolonged masturbation to the extent that it becomes a form of working out. Usually this results in sore forearms.

I got a serious jerkout after watching Anal Masters six times in a row last night.

by TayRexz April 21, 2011

Professor Hans Jerkov

Slang normally used to denote the act of masturbation.

You saw the mess he did with his... addiction?
Yeah, apparently he consulted Professor Hans Jerkov.

by Polaris Alpha April 25, 2010

jerkbros

horny guys who jerk off togehter

me and my college roomie were jerkbros for almost four years

by whack addict February 9, 2014