The Blastoise

A sex move in which you jizz on a girl's face, then when she's about to go wash it off, you whip out your bitchin' twin supersoakers and blast it off her face with twin streams of superpowered water.

Boy: Hey whats your favorite pokemon?
Man: I don't play pokemon.
Boy: Oh. Mine's the Blastoise.
Man: Go to your room.

by BTLighting February 2, 2011

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Blastoise

When someone is very inebriated, to the point that being a Pokemon makes complete sense.

Dad: Son, where are you?
Son: Father, I am Blastoise
Dad: Oh, lol, have fun

by Daski April 14, 2011

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Blastoise

Verb used during a game of Super Smash Brothers Melee when a Blastoise is being used to Pwn someone see Pwn

Man1: Holy Fucking Christ!
Man2: You so got Blastoised dude!

by Chris Schanley March 23, 2005

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Blastoise

When you vomit and diarrhoea at the same time,

Shit I'm going to Blastoise I should take my clothes off and get in the bath so I don't make a mess everywhere

I took at shit the other day that stank so much I puked all down myself, it went on my dick, nasty Blastoise

by phelm April 26, 2012

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Blastoise

The sexual act in where a man deprives himself of any sort of sexual activity for 3 months for the sole purpose of saving up sperm, then, with he's with his main biddie, he busts it all off on her face like a hydro pump!

"Yo that bitch Susmita? Yeah I gave her a fucking Blastoise, blat blat blat!"

by Bloood October 29, 2010

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