The name is quite self-explanatory, but don't let that make you thing you know everything you need to about the Butt-Stabbing Bandit. He is a ferocious monster that crawled out of hell itself, hungering for one thing; butt-related injuries.
If you are a guy, imagine having dozens of miniature testicles up your bum. Now picture them all bursting with the brutal stab of a 220 lbs. man and his full force punch of a 5 inch rusty carbon steel tactical knife. If you are a woman, well, I don't know how to relate it to you. So just imagine something really bad up your butt. Like childbirth! That's it, imagine you are giving birth in your ass. But...it reverses, I guess. Whatever.
This is the dark reality of few Americans. This occurrence is rare, and only seldom caught on tape. The side effects of an attack by the Butt-Stabbing Bandit include:
-Bleeding (duh)
-Crying
-Feeling of extreme pain
-Loss of bowel control (eww)
-Nightmares
-Depressing
-Rage
-More crying
-Anxiety
Note: One of the main results of an assault by the Butt-Stabbing Bandit results in the possible change in sexuality. The first stab changes you to the sexuality opposite from your original one. The second changes you back. And so on and so forth, leaving you at the mercy of if he stabs you an odd or even number of times.
If you are a guy, imagine having dozens of miniature testicles up your bum. Now picture them all bursting with the brutal stab of a 220 lbs. man and his full force punch of a 5 inch rusty carbon steel tactical knife. If you are a woman, well, I don't know how to relate it to you. So just imagine something really bad up your butt. Like childbirth! That's it, imagine you are giving birth in your ass. But...it reverses, I guess. Whatever.
This is the dark reality of few Americans. This occurrence is rare, and only seldom caught on tape. The side effects of an attack by the Butt-Stabbing Bandit include:
-Bleeding (duh)
-Crying
-Feeling of extreme pain
-Loss of bowel control (eww)
-Nightmares
-Depressing
-Rage
-More crying
-Anxiety
Note: One of the main results of an assault by the Butt-Stabbing Bandit results in the possible change in sexuality. The first stab changes you to the sexuality opposite from your original one. The second changes you back. And so on and so forth, leaving you at the mercy of if he stabs you an odd or even number of times.
Guy 1: Dude, what happened to you? We haven't seen you in weeks! I called your house, but all your roommate said was that you were in the hospital.
Guy 2: Nothing, man, nothing. *Starts to walk away, revealing the intensive bandage wrapping on his ass-region.
Guy 1: What's up with your ass, man?
Guy 2: I was.. I got attacked by the Butt-Stabbing Bandit, okay?!? Happy now?
Guy 1: Holy shit, dude... I had no idea. I'm sorry, like, I don't know what to say.
Guy 2: Just go, man. *Dark black and white flashback of attack* *Tear roles down cheek*
Guy 1: You okay?
Guy 2: Just go....
Guy 2: Nothing, man, nothing. *Starts to walk away, revealing the intensive bandage wrapping on his ass-region.
Guy 1: What's up with your ass, man?
Guy 2: I was.. I got attacked by the Butt-Stabbing Bandit, okay?!? Happy now?
Guy 1: Holy shit, dude... I had no idea. I'm sorry, like, I don't know what to say.
Guy 2: Just go, man. *Dark black and white flashback of attack* *Tear roles down cheek*
Guy 1: You okay?
Guy 2: Just go....
by JasperRide March 29, 2015
Get the Butt-Stabbing Bandit mug.A group of rebels who fight against the iron hand of Dema. They use the color yellow as their main motif for it signifes optimism to fight the gloominess of Dema. It is also said that the bishops can't see the color yellow.
"We are Banditøs. You will leave Dema and head true east. We renounce vialism." - Joshua Dun, the assumed leader of the Banditøs
by Calibraneum August 21, 2018
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Bandet • Bandette • bandetest • bandetest allies • bandeto • bandetta • tub girl bandet • Bandit • bandersnatch • Bander
Moose was both horrified and amused as he fell backwards into arms of his fellow team builders unable to control the powerful release of a fluttering bandersnap.
by Tennisbum February 3, 2010
Get the bandersnap mug.An outlaw who has just stepped out of the bath.
To get a clean bandit you must soap down your desperado, then scrub and rinse.
To get a clean bandit you must soap down your desperado, then scrub and rinse.
Clean Bandit:
She tells him "your bath ain't gonna be nothing like my bath (straight)
You're gonna wash and have a good bath
I'm gonna scrub what I've got to scrub" (stay up there, stay up there)
I never meant to leave you dirty
I never meant to do the dirt thing
Not to you (it's bathtime, bathtime, everybody)
'Cause every time I see you soaping
I wish I wasn't one of your exes
Get in the pool (it's bathtime, bathtime, everybody)
And now your wash is on repeat
And I'm scrubbing on to your heartbeat
And when you're clean, I feel incomplete
So if you want the truth
I just wanna be part of your symphony
She tells him "your bath ain't gonna be nothing like my bath (straight)
You're gonna wash and have a good bath
I'm gonna scrub what I've got to scrub" (stay up there, stay up there)
I never meant to leave you dirty
I never meant to do the dirt thing
Not to you (it's bathtime, bathtime, everybody)
'Cause every time I see you soaping
I wish I wasn't one of your exes
Get in the pool (it's bathtime, bathtime, everybody)
And now your wash is on repeat
And I'm scrubbing on to your heartbeat
And when you're clean, I feel incomplete
So if you want the truth
I just wanna be part of your symphony
by Fishyrich November 25, 2019
Get the Clean Bandit mug.The undercover identity of Toph Bei-Fong from the TV show "Avatar: The Last Airbender." At a very young age, she signed up for a fighting tournament under this name to escape her parents' detection, and proceeded to kick the asses of all people (mostly grown men) who dare to stand before her.
And now, I give you your champion... The Blind Bandit!
I will offer up this sack of gold to anyone who can defeat the Blind Bandit! ...What? No one dares challenge her?
I will offer up this sack of gold to anyone who can defeat the Blind Bandit! ...What? No one dares challenge her?
by medianoche27 January 17, 2009
Get the blind bandit mug.It's a National Day to pay respects to the late great Burt Reynolds. A true legend. It occurs on October 4th (or 10-4) each year.
by Vinyl66 October 4, 2018
Get the Bandit Day mug.A term originating from (and almost exclusively used on) Roblox used to describe low effort RPG games with repetitive gameplay, uninteresting combat, and little absolute 0 replay value. If the game is a Bandit Beater there is also a solid chance it's also a Cash grab.
"Person 1: So how is that new game that dropped like?"
"Person 2: 30 minutes in and the only thing I've been doing is punching stupid NPC's that don't even block."
"Person 1: Oh wow, yet another Bandit Beater."
"Person 2: 30 minutes in and the only thing I've been doing is punching stupid NPC's that don't even block."
"Person 1: Oh wow, yet another Bandit Beater."
by ASomewhatRealPerson January 29, 2022
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