ocular rectitis

this is the medical term for not being able to see your ass doing a particular daily activity. eg. school, work.

Phone conversation with boss
Boss: Hello
Me: Hi, this is(your name here)I can't make it into work today. I have ocular rectitis.
Boss: That sounds serious
Me: Ya, I can't see my ass coming to work today....

by Kaelli May 10, 2010

ocular smegma

A polite word for eye boogers-the dried,crusty material that collects on the inside corners of the eyes during sleep.Ocular smeg is naturally yellow in color,but,in women it can be black,dark blue or brown due to residues from mascara,eyeline,eye shadow,etc. Ocular smegma is very common in poodles and chihuahuas.Eye smeg can be particularly troublesome in persons suffering from colds,allegies,flu and pink eye.For some reason,young children don't like to eat eye smeg as much as they do boogers. Contrary to myth,ocular smegma is NOT caused by the Sand Man.

When I woke up this morning,I thought I had gone blind.It turned out my eyelids were matted shut with ocular smegma.

by wolfbait51 January 8, 2011

ocular sex

eye fucking

he had ocular sex with his girlfriend

by eyefucker July 21, 2003

ocular rape

1. when someone, usually a person, although pop-up ads qualify, forces you to see something that you don't want to see.

2. when you go to look at a website or image and the overwhelming sense of horrible design and/or absolute lack of morals behind its creation, makes you reel in terror that your eyes had to go through that trauma.

1. AHH! the ocular rape is unbearable, please close the window! No more goatse!

2. No more bible code websites. please. the ocular rape generated by that format is making me tear.

by maxzilla March 19, 2005

ocular socket

The holes in your skull which contain the eyes.

She always secretes fluid from her ocular sockets at weddings.

by D.H. 3 November 1, 2005

Ocular Mullet

Also known as a "lazy" or "wandering" eye, the ocular mullet is when one eye is always focused on business while the other is busy looking for the party

Did you see her ocular mullet? She was totally scoping out that hot guy with her party eye while I was talking to the business eye!

by kneesocksfetishrox June 4, 2015

Ocular insemination

The act of giving you're mate a good facial and getting it in their eye. Also works well with Nasal and Aural insemination in the nose and ears respectively.

Dude that guy just gave her an Ocular Insemination!

by Sol_Invictus December 21, 2007