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The Granite Counter Fallacy

The granite counter fallacy argues that the monetary value of an object is directly proportional to the amount of money that is spent on it. The fallacy lies in the essence that previous monies spent are subject to highly subjective rationale which may not add any practical value to the object. The fallacy is typically deployed with an appeal to novelty (newer is better) fallacy in order to manipulate the audience using current “trends” or “fads” in popular culture where the subject is likely to accept the argument based upon what they believe is “popular” and implies a “higher demand (value)”.
The Granite Counter Fallacy is as follows:

Example 1:
Person A purchases a house and spends x amount of dollars replacing the tile kitchen countertops with granite countertops.

Person A states that the value of the house has now increased because x dollars were spent replacing the tile counters with granite counters.

Person B states that they do not really mind tile countertops and to them, a countertop is a countertop - whether it is made of granite or tile does not change its practical use and therefore adds no real value.

Example 2:
Person A purchases a small house with large backyard for x dollars.

Person A demolishes the house and builds a much larger house with no backyard for y dollars.

Person A claims that the value of the new house is x + y because x dollars were spent on the previous house and y dollars were spent on the new house.

Person B says they prefer a house with a backyard and the lower electrical bills for cooling and heating, thus, the larger house’s added rooms add no real value from their point of view.

The fallacy is in Person A’s assumption that people will assume that a house is worth more than another house because it is larger while failing to understand the practical value that people may see in a smaller home. Such an argument can only work in an environment where the majority of people participate in a trend that unquestionably accepts the notion that a bigger house is better than a smaller house.

Example 3:
Person A purchases a white table for x dollars and a can of black paint for y dollars.

Person A uses all of the black paint to paint the entire table black.

Person A claims that the value of the table has increased to A + B.

The fallacy is in Person A’s failure to acknowledge that the table’s practical value remains unchanged. The reason for any increase in value is based upon the belief that black tables are more popular than white tables which is subject to change as fads come and go.
by AZDavidPhx February 11, 2009
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Gramatard

Also known as grammartard and grammatard, this word describes somebody who completely refuses to accept the commonly known grammar rules used in the English language. Most commonly seen in phone texts or online conversations, the offender tends to not notice when this is brought up.
Offender - "i didnt did do that"

Response - " You sir, are a gramatard."
by Jahadaz May 8, 2010
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gravity pong

A variation of beiruit often played in small dorm rooms. Gravity pong involves a vertical playing surface (often cardboard) to which 6 or 10 cups are attached in an equilateral triangle shape. The cups are then filled with equal amounts of an alcoholic beverage of choice (usu. 2 beers for 6 cups, 3 for 10). The two players (or teams) take turns shooting 2 shots each. It is up to the players to agree upon other rules regarding swatting, removal of cups, redemption shots, re-racking, etc. Generally speaking, the player/team who consumes less alcohol during the course of the game is the victor, though in the end everyone ends up getting drunk.
Our dorm room was too small for a proper beiruit table so we have to play gravity pong instead.
by fuckWAZZU September 18, 2006
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grampit

A small foreign particle, usually food, found in a drink.
Waiter! I just found a Grampit in my wine!
by the.pierced.one March 8, 2008
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Gravity Vag

A vagina that, by means of intense stretching and frequent penetration, creates a fluid, weightless feel for a male partner during sexual intercourse as if the penis were suspended in a zero gravity environment.
I heard that she has slept with so many men that she now has a gravity vag.
by Timothy Burgess July 5, 2008
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Gravity Whore

1. A fatso or a fatty. 2. A person using more than their fair share of gravity. 3. An obese person. 4. A fat chick.
Those people on 'The Biggest Loser' are gravity whores.
by t-wizard November 5, 2010
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Gratitudal

To be full of gratitude. Gratitude is sexy.
I am very gratitudal for our gratitude walks in Senior Leadership.
by senior - ognit yert October 15, 2019
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