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Scottism

A book of collected words or phrases spoken by someone named Scott.

Words and phrases which are inaccurate, silly, mispronounced, mistakenly said. Not said correctly

They then get added to the 'Scottism' book. Mainly added because they're funny and make people laugh unintentionally
That's another scottism

Oh it's another one, add it to the book.

He's said another one, add it to the scottism book

That's a pearler, add it to the scottisms
by Avery brixton October 28, 2019
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Scottish Pinch

A man with Scottish Pinch refers to a person who has a large penis and killer swag.
“Wow! Jordan’s so cool! That dude definitely has a Scottish pinch!”

“Kyle absolutely FUCKS. Buddy has a Scottish pinch.”
by KillerKFarren May 10, 2020
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Scottish Finger

When you stick your thumb in a girl's arse whilst eating her out her cunny and squeeze one of her hooters with your free hand as if you were playing the bagpipes.
I gave that sweet lassie's teet such a firm squeeze while performing the Scottish Finger that Lord William Wallace, himself, would have heard her scream.
by Buttsecks4Ever! August 29, 2010
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Scottish Turner

The affliction, most commonly manifest in drunken English people, that has the effect of making its sufferers speak in a scottish accent/dialect. After one too many pints of guest ale (usually titled Highland Fling or Glasgow Kiss etc) the Scottish turner starts by addressing everyone as Jimmy before sliding headlong into indecipherable (even to real Scots) gorbals. Will often end up staggering round the bar with a broken pint glass whilst attempting to headbutt sundry drinkers who've done nothing wrong. Is often ejected without difficulty and told to fuck off back to the Scotland from whence he never came.
English drinker: I say, did you see the Chelsea game last Tuesday?
Scottish Turner : See you, Jemmy...Yis're gunni git this up yis...yis fuckin bassad...Mon then, ya fuckin cunt yis...I wis born i'fuckin Glasgi.
by Lord Foreskin December 29, 2008
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scottish smile

A frown.

Derives from the cultural stereotype of a Scotsman being stern and sombre when not tanked up on whiskey.
Dave's stand-up routine drew scottish smiles from the audience and was critically panned.
by Henrietta Hawkins August 25, 2010
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Scottish smokescreen

When a large, red-haired man - preferably Scottish in heritage - pretends to perform oral sex on a woman but only uses his fingers and makes licking noises with his mouth. Similar to Fake chow.
How come Doug's beard doesn't smell like poonanny after he eats out his girlfriend, Kittie everynight?

Easy. He gives her the old Scottish smokescreen
by Horis Bybrinski September 12, 2011
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Scottish Regard

A fancy way of accepting someone's request to bid on your presence at an event.
Andy got a ton of bids for his presence at Operation Tofurkey but he only sent one Scottish Regard to that pederast Hanrahan.
by 2xDimes October 10, 2012
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