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scottism 

A form of attention deficit disorder in which the afflicted individual must turn trivial and often mundane everyday events into gambling opportunities, often at significant financial cost to friends and work colleagues. The affliction is permanent. Etymology derived from obscure Australian journalist.
When David suggested that his workmates contribute $25 each to run a book on which window of his Subaru Forrester would get rained on first, they told him they were tired of his Scottism
scottism by Hawkers October 26, 2006
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Scottism 

A book of collected words or phrases spoken by someone named Scott.

Words and phrases which are inaccurate, silly, mispronounced, mistakenly said. Not said correctly

They then get added to the 'Scottism' book. Mainly added because they're funny and make people laugh unintentionally
That's another scottism

Oh it's another one, add it to the book.

He's said another one, add it to the scottism book

That's a pearler, add it to the scottisms
Scottism by Avery brixton October 28, 2019

Scottism 

A fake disability exploited only when convenient in situations to excuse one's careless or pathological behaviors. Often, it is used to avoid taking responsibility for one's own words or actions.
"Dude I can't believe he lied to him in front of his own brother over the phone and said its no big deal and then went and stole from them in the same month!" "Well you know, he has Scottism so you really can't blame him."
Scottism by TheGoodFight November 10, 2013

Scottism 

Afflicts lazy cunts named Scott who can't proof-read or spell.
"That dick's got Scottism" said the handsome man.

Scottist / scottism 

A religious movement that worships Scott lavender

Black Scottish Cyclops

A black Scottish man who lost his eye to a book while searching a wizard's library for a nickel, is extremely drunk, and carries a huge amount of explosives. Also a mercenary fighting over a pit of gravel, and occasionally defending hat facilities against robots. In addition, he is skilled with a wide variety of melee weapons, including bottles, haunted swords, etc.
"The Black Scottish Cyclops, now extinct!"
-The Spy

Cunt (Scottish Definition) 

Used widely in the Scottish dialect to replace the word "person", not necessarily always used in a derogatory manner. Also replaces words which end in "one", referring to another person.
Use of word Cunt (Scottish Definition):

Where's my lighter? Some cunt's got it!
Are you coming out tonight? Everycunt is going.
How many cunts liked your Facebook status?
Does anycunt know the time?
He's an alright cunt him.
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Democrat 2: Well uh, Blexas!
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briefcake 

"Did you check out the briefcake in courtroom C?"
briefcake by Ben Frey April 6, 2006
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