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molestation defense

An updated version of the twinkie defense.

When the suspect in a criminal case uses the accusation that a close friend or relative violated them or fondled them as part of their defense, typically as a way to avoid taking responsibility for what they did. Most notably used in the Casey Anthony and Diane Downs cases, in which young mothers who killed their children accused their fathers of touching them inappropriately (even though this was irrelevant to the cases at hand and most likely completely false, as both women are pathological liars).
The intent of the molestation defense is to pander to the sympathy of jurors and media, to distract from the point of the case, and to escape taking responsibility.
Most of the time, the molestation defense is a cheap defense and a way for the suspect to excuse their crime; most victims of rape or incest do not kill, rape, steal, or commit other crimes, which should make anybody following a serious criminal case very wary about such accusations.

Casey Anthony, for one, has proven herself a sociopath by how willing that she is to accuse her father of a serious offense to save her own arse; this from the same woman who partied and whored it up in the month before her daughter was found.
by Lorelili August 3, 2011
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defenecate

Jack had to defenecate out the balcony window when both bathrooms were occupied.
by McCock, the Crime Dick December 12, 2008
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Strawman defense

Sometimes referred to as the "Sovereign Citizen defense" where somebody sets defense of invalid arguments under the law and misinterpret an argument based around the United States is a corporation, spelled their name in all caps, citing rulings that have no bearing whatsoever in their court case. This type of defense is generally used anti-socials looking to avoid any form of accountability.
There's John using the strawman defense filing paperwork that he's not really "John" because they spelled his name in all caps in his discovery file and misusing court rulings from 150 years ago to claim they have no jurisdiction over him so they must let him go.

Darrell Brooks tried this type of argument which is growing im popularity amongst psychopaths and their defense.
by SchwarzenMann October 30, 2022
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King Kong Defense

Legal strategy used by Carl Lundström's lawyer in the Pirate Bay trial of 2009.
This defense is effective for its ability to come out of left field, catching the prosecution completely off guard and furthermore, obliterating their weak arguments.
Carl Lundstrom's attorney:"The person responsible for uploads of copyrighted files might as well be a user named King-Kong in the jungles of Cambodia".

More examples...
Prosecution: Blah blah, you're aiding people in stealing intellectual property
Defense: Wrong, it was King Kong in Cambodia!
Prosecution: WTF!!!?
Defense: Suck the King Kong defense! How do you ever expect to win now?
by Arockalypse February 18, 2009
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Chewbaca Defense

A defense used by Johnny Cocran that was used help Chef in the episode Chef Aid in South Park
Ladies and Gentlemen of the jury, this, is Chewbaca. Now why am i talking about Chewbaca when this man's life is on the line, i tell you... I dont know, I-Dont-Know.
by adfneionvo July 8, 2004
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salsa defense

When a person attempts to bean dip another person, they may block the bean dip by hitting the opponent's scooping hand and declaring "salsa". The person who deflected the bean dip is then allowed a five second period to lightly hit the other person, all the while yelling "salsa, salsa, salsa".
Andrew tried to bean dip me earlier, but i used the salsa defense and blocked it.
by special prune May 26, 2011
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hatter defense

A defense to trolling, most commonly on World of Warcraft forums, that involves saying that the troll "can't stop hiding behind alts and troll on their main." Usually improperly punctuated with poor grammar.
Near perfect execution of the hatter defense:

"Is it because I have what little balls it takes to post on my main, I mean I understand the point of some trolls its either they want some anonymity, which makes no sense seeing how your in a faceless game, or they want to make you mad because you don't know their main and can't bug them"
by KalametyTheRogue April 13, 2010
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