crumpet

Small creatures that live primarily under couches and beds. They resemble cotton balls or soot balls or dust bunnies, although any smallish and round object with eyes and legs may be referred to as a crumpet. Most have stick-like arms and legs without knees or elbows. Crumpets are generally non-gender specific. Most people are unaware of their existence.

As I was eating my plate of crumpets, one tried to escape and I had to stab him with my fork as he ran across the table.

by Goobermaster January 19, 2005

crumpet

the female reproductive organs. i.e. pussy

"Dude, i got four fingers into her crumpet"
"Yeah, the crumpet was a little hairy, but she had a nice rack..."

by Chode Master September 6, 2003

Cumpets

That thing where you ejaculate into a sock and then use it as a hand puppet.

Hey stepbro can you show me your cumpets?

by Deer cumpets February 9, 2021

Crumpet

Someone who is fat and greasy and leaves a big stain of grease on someone or something if she or she touches it.

Mei's sucha helpful crumpet she can grease my frying pan to fry eggs.

by FannyMay August 29, 2009

crumpet

the derogatory word for the slit between a womans legs. on asian women this is called a crumpetttttttttttttttttttttttttt!!! and on the french it is known as a crossiant. some are pink some are brown and you even get the purple ones but all in all the all serve the same function and that is, anal sex.

man: can i butter your crumpet?
woman: if i can butter your rod
man: id like to see you try bitch!!!!

by xcczxczxc March 1, 2009

The Return Of The Incredible Hardcore Crumpet Masters Of Doom

A.K.A. The Best Damn Band In Chippenham College. Known for such classics as "Walnut" and "Yum, Yum, Someone else's food"

"Hey, have you heard of The Return Of The Incredible Hardcore Crumpet Masters Of Doom?"
"No..."

by James 'Natty' Lloyd October 21, 2003

crumpet

The act of facilitating oral sex while one is occupied in the washroom; specifically defecating.

-Harold and Kumar Escape from Guantanamo Bay: A 'crumpet' is "when a girl gives you an English pastry while you're sitting on the patio taking a tea break!"

by Blake A. Eveleigh May 24, 2008