Small creatures that live primarily under couches and beds. They resemble cotton balls
or soot balls
or dust bunnies
, although any smallish and round object with eyes and legs may be referred to as a crumpet. Most have stick-like arms and legs without knees or elbows. Crumpets are generally non-gender specific. Most people are unaware of their existence.
As I was eating my plate of crumpets, one tried to escape and I had to stab him with my fork as he ran across the table.