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uncle boner

An uncle boner is a dirty filthy, fat, ugly often bald old man of 40 - 60 years of age or older typically found in south east Asia with a late teens to early twenties Asian escort with him.
Gross, look at that uncle boner over there with that 17 year old girl. He has to be at least double her age, triple her weight and triple her dimensions in every direction.
by BorisSDT August 27, 2011
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Throw a Boner

I don't want to throw a boner during my speech, like Kristin routinely does as a supervisor.
by Almost Outsourced August 18, 2008
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boner chief

When a man has a boner from a woman for some reason,he feels like he's a leader because he's the only one with a boner.
jack: hey juan, what happend with you and carol last night?

juan: it was great. i was the boner chief. haha.
by that guy 2468 December 2, 2010
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Boner Hematoma

The bruising a dick gets when you screw a very skinny girl.
Jeff: Hey Mike, I finally screwed Heather last night.

Mike: Was it good or what?

Jeff: Not really. She's so skinny I got a boner hematoma.
by patsguy June 18, 2011
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Sparkly Boner

Ignorant indulgence in whale sex followed by contemplation of self worth and visions of unicorns
How do you get your sparkly boner?

I was born with it.
by 64950 November 21, 2010
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Nano-boner

A small twitch of the penis caused by sexual thoughts or stimuli.
"Okay, sir, could you pull down your pants so I could have a look at the problem. Just relax, sir, nothing to be embarassed about."
"Certainly."
"Ah okay, it seems to be a standard skin condition on the top of the penis, nothing to worry about. My 20-year-old daughter had the same thing on her breasts. She..."
"..."
"Oh dear, I'm sorry about that twitch it just did."
"In the profession we call that a nano-boner!"
by Autonova May 6, 2010
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Liquid Boner

Another name for making a girl wet.
"Man, you totally give me a liquid boner just then! I'm so wet!"
by LOLingAllTheWay March 12, 2014
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