A slang term for the back alley, night club in Calgary, Alberta.
The Crack Alley is the self proclaimed "best rock bar in Canada". It is known throughout Calgary for it's "titty shots", rock music, lack of dress code and lack of security pat down to find the knife/bear mace you probably have on you if you frequent the crack alley.
Staff: It is well known by Calgarians that the crack alley has the most fakest, tannest, bleach-blond, silicone breasted bartenders in all of calgary.
Music: You can request a song to be played at the crack alley if you are a "18 year old" highschool girl who is willing to suck off one of the washed up, 40 year old, DJs in the DJ booth. Although the crack alley does play more rock music than any other night club in Calgary, because of this request policy at least half of the music played on an average night is Lady Gaga, Rihanna or something similar.
Entertainment: Among the many things to do at the crack alley the most popular are; getting "titty shots", fighting (on the dancefloor or in the parking lot) and nearly choking to death from the bear mace that is periodically sprayed by random assholes over the dancefloor.
Clientele: crack alley customers consist of oil rig workers who make a lot of money but blow it all on coke, "18 year old" highschool girls, basically every metal head/skid who went to your highschool and normal people who haven't been in a while and need to remind themselves why they don't go there.
The Crack Alley is the self proclaimed "best rock bar in Canada". It is known throughout Calgary for it's "titty shots", rock music, lack of dress code and lack of security pat down to find the knife/bear mace you probably have on you if you frequent the crack alley.
Staff: It is well known by Calgarians that the crack alley has the most fakest, tannest, bleach-blond, silicone breasted bartenders in all of calgary.
Music: You can request a song to be played at the crack alley if you are a "18 year old" highschool girl who is willing to suck off one of the washed up, 40 year old, DJs in the DJ booth. Although the crack alley does play more rock music than any other night club in Calgary, because of this request policy at least half of the music played on an average night is Lady Gaga, Rihanna or something similar.
Entertainment: Among the many things to do at the crack alley the most popular are; getting "titty shots", fighting (on the dancefloor or in the parking lot) and nearly choking to death from the bear mace that is periodically sprayed by random assholes over the dancefloor.
Clientele: crack alley customers consist of oil rig workers who make a lot of money but blow it all on coke, "18 year old" highschool girls, basically every metal head/skid who went to your highschool and normal people who haven't been in a while and need to remind themselves why they don't go there.
I did a bunch of blow in the bathroom of the crack alley last night and got into a fight with some drunk ass
by someone who's been January 4, 2011
Get the The Crack Alley mug.by William Warney April 7, 2010
Get the Alley rat mug.A beautiful princess treated like a queen. she is most amazing girl out there. one of the prettiest gorgeous girl you will ever see in a lifetime.
by Renee7341 May 16, 2016
Get the Aleya mug."Can I get you a drink?" "I'll have a squashed strawberry alleycat." "I'm not sure what that is" 'It's simple, it's 12 fresh strawberries sliced, 3 ounces of dark rum, a splash of creme de..."
a squashed strawberry alley cat is 12 large strawberries, chopped. 3 ounces dark rum, a splash of creme de menthe. 1 ounce of suger. a thimble of grape pucker. a soupcon of cinammon. a touch of rupleminze. a klaxon of pineapple sauce. a grimace of red wine. Garnish with a muskmelon wedge, a hyacynthe petal, a childs laughter, and a tampon.
by butterballs January 21, 2009
Get the squashed strawberry alley cat mug.Any area where many extremely hot females stay, shop, socialize, and/or walk through. This area can usually be found in shopping malls and universities. Men of all ages who find this heaven on earth area can quite possibly achieve a raging erection, become wide-eyed, and/or forget all of his problems. Medical research has proven that, visiting this area on a daily basis will help you get over your ex-girlfriend(s), spark interests in women, forget any current girlfriends, and increase blood flow to your penis. May also be known as hard-on street.
1. David and his buddy, Gerardo, became speechless when they opened the doors and discovered the secret of "Hard-on Alley."
2. I always get a massive erection when I meet my girlfriend in hard-on alley.
3. Johnny looks forward to shopping with his ugly girlfriend in hopes that he will be able to walk through hard-on alley.
4. When Jimmy is sad, he always walks to hard-on alley to raise his spirits.
5. As he walked through hard-on alley, young Timmy discovered a lump in his pants for the first time in his life. A few seconds later, confusing feelings and questions filled his innocent brain.
6. My psychiatrist told me to go to hard-on alley to forget all my troubles. It's a Hakuna Matata place.
7. Pedro casually walked alone down hard-on alley and felt that the Gods in heaven would smile upon him and help him use his mojo toward the hot and often dangerous female creatures that surrounded him.
8. This isn't heaven! It's hard-on alley.
9. Hard-on alley is a great place to find and talk to chicas calientes.
2. I always get a massive erection when I meet my girlfriend in hard-on alley.
3. Johnny looks forward to shopping with his ugly girlfriend in hopes that he will be able to walk through hard-on alley.
4. When Jimmy is sad, he always walks to hard-on alley to raise his spirits.
5. As he walked through hard-on alley, young Timmy discovered a lump in his pants for the first time in his life. A few seconds later, confusing feelings and questions filled his innocent brain.
6. My psychiatrist told me to go to hard-on alley to forget all my troubles. It's a Hakuna Matata place.
7. Pedro casually walked alone down hard-on alley and felt that the Gods in heaven would smile upon him and help him use his mojo toward the hot and often dangerous female creatures that surrounded him.
8. This isn't heaven! It's hard-on alley.
9. Hard-on alley is a great place to find and talk to chicas calientes.
by SPIKYCLOUD June 24, 2009
Get the Hard-on Alley mug.The queen who gets her name from the King himself Shahrukh Khan. The gorgeous woman that completes him and is absolutely amazing!
by DIVAsrk January 20, 2011
Get the Aleya mug.The greatest movie that was never made. Stars Kirk Lazaris and Tobey Maguire. Its about two priests who fall in love. But, since it is against the religion, Kirk's character is banished and forced to write scripture for 50 years.
by p1fl February 28, 2009
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