Hard & Early 

By going against all expert advice, failing miserably, but claiming victory anyway and hoping nobody noticed.
Feigning a quick response, but in reality putting in a lackluster and slow performance.

Demonstrably doing too little, too late.

"2 months after they requested it and 3 days after the city was taken, we went hard & early and sent a rapid rescue team in a very slow plane." Jacinda Ardern.

"After covid was in the country, we went hard & early to close the borders. We have eliminaded it!" Jacinda Ardern

Hard & Early by Enough NZ! August 19, 2021

dick with ears 

A male that is a self-absorbed, clueless piece of shit. Hated by both men and women. In other words, a real DICK and hence the name "dick with ears."

Mike is dick with ears.

dick with ears by JohnstonGuy August 12, 2004

Early Onset Caucasia 

Mental Illness found in white women aka“Karen“ worsens with age.

Symptoms include/not limited to Attacking others then playing victim when authority arrives. Knowing you're deadass wrong, STILL want a manager. Calls 911 on anyone doing anything, while black. Use police as threat to harm, not service to help, denys police brutality. Theft of music, machinery, property, wealth, ideas... literally ALL OF THE THINGS IN ALL OF THE PLACES.

Know causes include /not limited to, insatiable thirst for chocolate, Only have a tiny vanilla, raisins in potato salad, thinking Jesus was white, short strokes, lack of exercise or results, specifically doing squats.

Cures- Hennessey, Atlanta, swap paprika for Lawrys, vitD super veggies resembles eggplant in size &girth. That D taken orally, anally, vaginally & swallow juice or use as facial (can’t take too good of care of that skin!) Start by using only 1D at a time but the only snitch here, is you!

NOTE: Seeking medical advice is NOT recommended as it will trigger EOC fits due to the Doctors sudden disregard for your well-being.

FUN FACT- EOC is unique because those without it, suffer from it the most.

- Becky Snow

Knowing she was at risk of contracting EARLY ONSET CAUCASIA, Amber got divorced, moved to Atlanta, vaguely remembers drinking Hennessey, is making a conscious effort to regularly consume her veggies and is no longer at risk of contracting this horrific illness.

Early Onset Caucasia by Becky Snow April 28, 2021

Eargasm 

1. An emotional high caused by listening to an exceptional composition. Usually but not always after a period of musical abstinence.

2. Intense sexual arousal brought on by listening to somebody else's voice; usually accompanied by tingles down the spine or a warm feeling localized at the nape of the neck, indicative of instant sexual rapport. The aforementioned may however be caused by the building of rapport in general. This is usually considerably more intense with whispers in the ear; usually dictated by context and tone of voice rather than what is actually said (up until a plausible limit of nonsensicality or unpleasant content) due to implicit meaning.

3. A term used to describe pleasant sounds in general or the effect of, say, an exceptional surround sound system.

4. A spasm of the ear; usually not unpleasant.

1. Wow! (The musical climax of) Rammstein's new song just gave me one hell of an eargasm!

2. (Introspective) Her mellifluous British accent just gave me an intense eargasm.

3. Wow! This new stereo system of yours is an absolute eargasm!

4. Urgh, I just had an eargasm out of the blue...

Eargasm by Anonymous Synonymous August 2, 2011

Early Christmas Fallacy

When you celebrate an event before knowing it's final outcome. Often applied in sports, video games, and gambling, etc.

The idea behind the phrase is that children often tend to open their presents before 25th.

Kon: Guys! I think the Lakers are going to win in 4 this year!
Edgar: Definitely! Let's go drink some beer to celebrate!

after championship where Lakers won in 5.

Shyam: You guys fell for the Early Christmas Fallacy.

Next time just wait until they win before celebrating guys.

Early Christmas Fallacy by lolja GUYS tell'em July 31, 2009

Eargasmic 

Music that is so unbelievably amazing to listen to.

Dude! Did you hear that new album? Yeah! It was eargasmic!

Eargasmic by whoa_its_soph March 28, 2011

earth muffin 

Environmentally conscience, socially aware, recycles when she can, prefers organic or natural products, and will drive out of the way to support mom and pop before large consumer corporations. She’s a modern hippy but also has a practical side. She’s cute, showers regularly, and encourages others to do the right thing without being judgmental or critical.

Store Checker: Would you prefer paper or plastic?
Earth Muffin: I brought my own reuseable duffle! It's made out of recycled materials, too.

earth muffin by JennX March 27, 2008