nonce

Like "once", "twice" and "thrice", but relating to something that has happened exactly zero times.

"How many times have you actually done this?"
"Once or twice."
"Really?"
"Okay, more like nonce."

by Adman12 December 30, 2005

Nonce

A decriptive that gives a number of frequency of zero. A non-occuring event.

Q: "How many times did you go out with him?"

A: "Nonce. Zero times"

by Lucien Nyx November 20, 2012

NoNcE

A handsome guy

Ayeee I did it you nonce

by Angry bird™ April 22, 2019

Nonce

Somebody who uses the reset button on Wreckfest.

That fucking nonce just reset as I was about to hit him.

by Gertdin March 1, 2020

nonce

slang name for celtic football club, a team for victims of child abuse and religious buggery.

we beat nonce fc 2-0 the other day

by rab douglas February 24, 2005

nonce

The sort of man that would come into your life, principly, to rape your babies. He may be a 'relative', or a 'complete stranger'. Will either befriend you or find ways of getting close enough to you to get at your children.
This may sound strange, but, he may even find a criminal way of impregnating you while you sleep and steal the undeveloped fetus for sex with the baby.

For many years, they drugged and raped me and stole my babies as I slept, and then raped the babies. He must be a nonce.

by janetw May 5, 2006

Nonce

A nonce is a slang word usually used by British people. Nonce simply means a very very Nice person

"The shopkeeper in the corner shop is a nonce"

by Herku July 15, 2021