Purell Sure

99.9% sure

I'm purell sure that she's taken.

by caterpillarcock March 18, 2011

porcelain kiss

Term used when a man is on the toilet and the penis touches the cold inside wall of the toilet.

Was taking taking a shit and everything was ruined with the porcelain kiss.

by anymm July 9, 2014

Porcelain Club

Similar to the upper decker but requires much more skill, balance, and dexterity. It also requires a lot more clean up. The toilet used for this act requires a seat AND a lid to create the full effect. The act of defecating on the lip or edge of the toilet bowl, then after log is carefully laid, gently close the seat and lay another log on the seat directly above the first one. Once that is accomplished, gently close the lid and create a multi layered turd sandwich otherwise known as the Porcelain Club.

Ed thought it would be funny to leave an upper decker at my house. I took revenge my to the next level by leaving a Porcelain Club at his house.

by bjhawk August 21, 2018

Porcelain seal sex

When you go from the shower, straight to the bed and don’t dry off and proceed to have sexual intercourse.

“Hey babe, you wanna have

porcelain seal sex tonight”
“hell yeah i do”

by Yeetson September 12, 2020

pointing percy at the porcelain

The act of pointing one's penis towards the toilet bowl whilst standing. Usually accompanied by urination.

"Jeff, your dinner's ready!"

"Give me a minute! I'm just pointing percy at the porcelain!"

by John Superman December 6, 2013

riding the porcelain bus

puking into the toilet.

Damn I drank a whole case last night and now I'm riding the porcelain bus.

by Nick D February 13, 2003

porcelain tug

(v.) masturbation while sitting on the toilet.

The shower is running and you are taking a piss. You suddenly realize that you need to take care of business before you get in the shower. You quickly perform the "porcelain tug."

by Kyle Vade October 22, 2006