disaster

A real elmore, fuck up, fiasco or general mess.

Enron was a complete elmore; the result was a disaster for the shareholders and employees alike.

by Mmmm Lewinsky October 9, 2007

Scrotanic Disaster

A horrific event occuring to one's scrotum or sack, usually used as a threat.

Dude, if you don't chill soon you're going to find yourself in the midst of a Scrotanic Disaster!

by Errr June 19, 2006

Disasterbation

To gorge on the massive amounts of fear-mongering news media that reports on nothing more than tragic and violent events across the country and the world.

The disasterbation in this country was waning after the shooting in Arizona until the earthquake/tsunami hit Japan.

by Sudds McDuff April 13, 2011

Disasterbate

When, after unsuccessfully attempting to pick up at the bar (or elsewhere), one returns home to masturbate... Generally while sobbing.

"I was chatting up this totally hot yoga instructor all night when she decides to mention that she has a boyfriend... So I basically had no choice but to head home alone and disasterbate."

by djwendo March 21, 2010

disasturbating

Disasturbating: To revel in doom-mongering predictions about the future of mankind. A particular predilection of left-leaning environmentalists who claim we are but 30 years away from living in Cormac McCarthy's 'The Road', without radical change that is diametrically incompatible with how people actually want to live, and that is completely futile at the individual level anyway. There's also a right-wing version that thinks gay marriage and universal healthcare will somehow bring about the end of days.

"Oh my God, Peak Oil! Polar Ice Caps melting! Unchecked population growth! Stockpile canned goods and a shotgun, the apocalypse is coming!"
"FFS, stop disasturbating."

by OnlyMe! November 8, 2013

Disaster Box

Usually used to describe a person who is struggling to the extreme at something or said situation they're struggling at.

This is derived from the game NFL Blitz 2000, where the announcer can be heard occasionally saying "It's a disaster box!"

You've been trying to balance that beer bottle on your nose for 15 minutes now, and have managed to put 3 new stains into the carpet... you're a disaster box

by The Trash Monster July 28, 2011

disastrabate

To masturbate to climax, using only footage of horrific natural disasters as pornography.

Bret: hey did you see the news last night? That tsunami killed like 300 people.

Chad: yeah man I TIVO'ed it so I can disastrabate when my wife leaves tonight.

by Moosedontcare November 5, 2015