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Higginbotham's Constant

Higginbotham's Constant (denoted as lower-case 'h') is a mathematical constant which represents the total sum of all practical intelligence on any given planet.

The implication is that the higher the population of sentient beings on the planet, the lower the average intelligence will be among any large sample set. This does not preclude beings of higher intellect, but it requires that on average, there is one person as far below average as the former being is above average.
Person 1: "Why does it seem like the people staffing the company helpdesk get dumber every day?"
Person 2: "Higginbotham's Constant in action, my friend..."

Person 1: "I was on jury duty the other day. Have you seen what the trash of society wears into a courtroom? How has society lost so much respect for anyone and anything else in just a few decades?"
Person 2: "Higginbotham strikes again..."
by ComputerKurt May 18, 2010
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Premature Ventricular Contraction

when your heart skips a beat.

may be perceived as a "skipped beat" or felt as palpitations in the chest. In a normal heartbeat, the ventricles contract after the atria have helped to fill them by contracting; in this way the ventricles can pump a maximized amount of blood both to the lungs and to the rest of the body . In a PVC, the ventricles contract first, which means that circulation is inefficient. However, single beat PVC arrhythmias do not usually pose a danger and can be asymptomatic in healthy individuals.1
Babe, you make me have premature ventricular contractions. <3
by Hoochy Mama May 15, 2011
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bowl constrictor

a large, snake-like bowel movement that requires plunging and several flushes to send it on its' way. Most embarrassing when it rears its' ugly head on an away game.
double flusher dookie deuce dump poop pooh doo-doo turd poo caca bowl constrictor
by pinkhaus March 17, 2009
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I am in constant agony. My life is a mess. As a kid I had a natural aptitude for math and science, but I let it get to my head, ultimately ruining my possibility to go to college.

I wasted my life playing video games and watching the television; the natural talents I once had have apathied and worn away, leaving the one thing I was good at behind.

My life has been nothing but a fastly accelerating downward spiral and I have failed to provide anything of with to anyone.
Isaiah: Hey, Ed! Haven't seen you in a few years, how are you don't?

Me: I am in constant agony, this is not a joke; please help me.

Isaiah: ...
Me: ...
Isaiah: yeah, same.
by MrDrEdward October 31, 2021
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poo contractions

An overwhelming sense of pain, panic, cramping, and cold sweats that sweeps over someone when they are about to have diarrhea...especially if they are forced to hold it longer than they need to.

The feeling comes and goes, but gradually increases in frequency...like when women give birth...but this time you are giving birth to a giant wet shit.
Jeff's poo contractions became stronger and more intense as he searched for a clean public bathroom. Thankfully, his sphincter was strong and held back the flow.
by Dooodooo Man March 11, 2008
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boa constrictor

A snake that is orignally from Central and south America. Many of these species are available to purchase from breeders.
Look at that albino Boa Constrictor, that bitch is SICK!!!
by Ramalamham August 24, 2005
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constructionfuck

A major constriction in traffic flow caused by a long term road construction project in a heavily traveled region.
I was late for work this morning thanks to the major constructionfuck between HWY 494 and 60 on Interstate 35.
by Tacheyon April 2, 2009
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