Existence

Something you will search up when you're having an existential crisis.

Kid: Mom, what is my existence?
Mom: Welcome to the club. We all here are suffering.

by Suck my piano June 23, 2019

fornicate my existence

a fancier and funnier way of syaing "fuck my life"

-Dude i just did your ma

-Fornicate my existence

by Don L December 9, 2008

existence is pain

Its true

Meeseeks: Existence is pain
Other meeseeks:Well said

by A retarded fuck May 14, 2018

Excuse

An excuse is a reason for which an individual does or doesn’t do something; it is a transfer of blame from oneself to some other external.

"I did not attend the gym today because I was tired".
"I don't spend my free time reading books because its boring".
"I get drunk because it relaxes me".
"I am overweight because I love food too much".
"I am poor because of the top 1%".
The penultimate excuse involves the movement of things (Time): "I couldn't because I ran out of time".

by AkilahC May 30, 2018

Total Existence Failure

When something malfunctions by virtue of not existing at all. Taken (but not precisely) from "Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy". In the original usage, a spaceship existed for a while and then spontaneously disappeared.

Bob: Can I borrow your car?
Bill: Nope. Sorry. It's having a total existence failure.

by Al Benedict October 22, 2009

Fucking Excuse You

To be offended and your saying excuse you but with fuck in it

Stacy: Your bottom ia nasty
Grechin: Fucking Excuse You but your lip isn't any better

by htt. suckass June 2, 2015

End of the World Excuse

An excuse used to justify things that would only be made right if the world were to end.

a. I maxed out my credit card and cheated on my wife because I thought the world was going to end on December 21st, 2012. Now I need and excuse better then the End of the World Excuse.

by kbates55 May 10, 2009