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Turd Milkshake Fallacy

A logical fallacy whereby someone points out that one thing is better than another when, in fact, both items in the comparison are horrible.
Person A: "I'd much rather hook up with Girl-X, she's better looking than Girl-Y."

Person B: "That's like saying you'd rather drink a turd milkshake instead of being beaten savagely with cacti. While the turd milkshake may arguably be better, it's still a turd milkshake and it still sucks. My point is that you shouldn't sleep with either of those heinous-looking girls, and your turd milkshake fallacy isn't helping your argument."
by ironchef8000 May 2, 2009
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melon turd

a turd that smells and looks like a melon
by noob May 13, 2005
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turkish turd

A large, constipated, dry turd that stretches the anus to a point that may be sexually arousing.
Ever since I had that turkish turd, I'm very open to anal sex.
by Nikolai Jerkov July 9, 2007
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turdsnatcher

One who acts in a manner akin to someone who would actually steal a turd....an asshole!
A patron at a restaurant who puts his/her hand in the mint bowl and drops a few back into the bowl.....what a turdsnatcher!
by JS 827CA October 13, 2006
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Turd Curling

Turd Curling is the act of curling ones fingers into claws during an extended effort to remove a toilet punishing turd from one's bodily orifice.
I must've eaten too much cheese. I caught myself turd curling. I had to soak my hands in hot water for an hour to loosen them up from the locked position.
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tardspiracy

To beileve in a conspiracy that is so rediculous, the only explanation for it is that you are mentally retarded.
Hey man did you see that 9/11 video? Yeah what a tardspiracy!
by Andrew Werlinger November 7, 2006
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gold plated turd

No matter how hard you try to improve certain things, its basic nature remains the same.
"That car fanatic has been spending thousands of dollars on that '58 Edsel...its just a gold plated turd!"
by MoJo Mojokowski August 9, 2005
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