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Mother: *knocks on door* Billy, what are you doing in there?
Billy: uhhh... NOTHING.
Mother: Dammit Billy, you're a chronic masturbator just like your father.
Billy: uhhh... NOTHING.
Mother: Dammit Billy, you're a chronic masturbator just like your father.
by sir gibsalot December 9, 2008
Get the chronic masturbator mug.The Seinfeld Chronicles is the pilot episode of the NBC series, Seinfeld. It originally aired on July 5, 1989. The original title of the episode was Good News, Bad News however it has been confirmed by the creators that the title of the pilot is The Seinfeld Chronicles.
It was rebroadcast in 1990 after the show had been picked up as a series.
The episode was written by creators, Larry David & Jerry Seinfeld and was directed by Art Wolff.
Plot
Spoiler warning: Plot and/or ending details follow.
Jerry Seinfeld and George Costanza are seated at Pete's Luncheonette debating over a shirt button. The waitress, Claire, comes over to their table and pours each a cup of coffee. George tells Claire he does not want caffeine in his coffee and Jerry corrects him by telling George she is an expert waitress. The two continue to talk and finally leave when Jerry has to do laundry.
The following evening while watching a late Mets game, he receives a phone call from a potential girlfriend, Laura, whom he met on the road. She asks if she can stay over his apartment since she cannot find a "decent hotel" (a fact George contests). Jerry invites her but is unsure if her visit is intended to be romantic or not. George and Jerry continue to debate fine details in Laura's conversation with Jerry to determine the true nature of the visit. A character known in the pilot as "Kessler," (who in all future episodes is known as Kramer) joins in asking Jerry why he would even give her a choice about where to sleep by bringing in another bed. The episode gives viewers a quick glimpse at George's profession (real estate) and also Kramer's (questionable get rich quick schemes).
At the airport, George and Jerry continue to talk in an effort to identify the possible signals Laura might give upon her arrival. Laura arrives and takes Jerry (and George) by surprise. The two arrive at Jerry's apartment and he feels uncomfortable with the situation. Laura removes some excess clothing to get comfortable and asks for wine. Jerry believes he has gotten to the bottom of the whole question. His plans are abruptly interrupted when he learns Laura has a fiancé. Jerry realizes he has no chance with Laura but has already committed himself — and his studio apartment — to an entire weekend with her.
Note
The episode does not feature the character of Elaine Benes. Her character was introduced as a result of constructive criticism based on this episode.
Lee Garlington, who played Claire (the waitress at Pete's) in the pilot, although credited as a regular, was not asked to appear in the series and is only featured in this episode.
The restaurant Jerry and George are eating lunch at is known as Pete's Luncheonette in this episode. It will later be known as the well-known Monk's Cafe for the remainder of the series.
It was rebroadcast in 1990 after the show had been picked up as a series.
The episode was written by creators, Larry David & Jerry Seinfeld and was directed by Art Wolff.
Plot
Spoiler warning: Plot and/or ending details follow.
Jerry Seinfeld and George Costanza are seated at Pete's Luncheonette debating over a shirt button. The waitress, Claire, comes over to their table and pours each a cup of coffee. George tells Claire he does not want caffeine in his coffee and Jerry corrects him by telling George she is an expert waitress. The two continue to talk and finally leave when Jerry has to do laundry.
The following evening while watching a late Mets game, he receives a phone call from a potential girlfriend, Laura, whom he met on the road. She asks if she can stay over his apartment since she cannot find a "decent hotel" (a fact George contests). Jerry invites her but is unsure if her visit is intended to be romantic or not. George and Jerry continue to debate fine details in Laura's conversation with Jerry to determine the true nature of the visit. A character known in the pilot as "Kessler," (who in all future episodes is known as Kramer) joins in asking Jerry why he would even give her a choice about where to sleep by bringing in another bed. The episode gives viewers a quick glimpse at George's profession (real estate) and also Kramer's (questionable get rich quick schemes).
At the airport, George and Jerry continue to talk in an effort to identify the possible signals Laura might give upon her arrival. Laura arrives and takes Jerry (and George) by surprise. The two arrive at Jerry's apartment and he feels uncomfortable with the situation. Laura removes some excess clothing to get comfortable and asks for wine. Jerry believes he has gotten to the bottom of the whole question. His plans are abruptly interrupted when he learns Laura has a fiancé. Jerry realizes he has no chance with Laura but has already committed himself — and his studio apartment — to an entire weekend with her.
Note
The episode does not feature the character of Elaine Benes. Her character was introduced as a result of constructive criticism based on this episode.
Lee Garlington, who played Claire (the waitress at Pete's) in the pilot, although credited as a regular, was not asked to appear in the series and is only featured in this episode.
The restaurant Jerry and George are eating lunch at is known as Pete's Luncheonette in this episode. It will later be known as the well-known Monk's Cafe for the remainder of the series.
by P.redeckis June 11, 2006
Get the The Seinfeld Chronicles mug.When you have no weed. And you have nothing better to do then to go on youtube and watch videos of people smoking it.
by PoonjabPackit420 June 26, 2008
Get the Chronic Boredom mug.It's when someone is so dumb you are sure they are retarded but not medically diagnosed as being retarded.
by icchie_x October 8, 2009
Get the Chronic Retardation mug.The act of attaching copious amounts of marijuana to any type of dynamite or firework which results in a massive explosion of kush that spreads a god-like odor throughout the land.
by Trickmaster 5002 March 2, 2009
Get the chronic boom mug.