Masturbate

Verb

To stroke your penis up and down until white shit comes out the top.
by Joetherealone September 29, 2021
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masturbate

Lana was feeling lonely, so she opened "The hub" then she got wet, she started rubbing and a puddle of cum is now in her bed
by poopystinkyanas May 20, 2022
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masturbate

i assume you guys are here to get horny, so here!
sarah was home alone and extremely horny. she turned off her bedroom light and took her pants off. she was so excited to masturbate that she leaped in bed and pulled the covers up to her chin. she started to touch her breasts and her nipples got hard. she reached over on her nightstand and grabbed her laptop. in the search bar she typed "pornhub." once she got on the porn, she clicked threesome. sarah felt very aroused by the threesome on the screen that she started touching herself. she imagined that her crush, jacob was the one touching her. she slowly crept her finger into her hole and started aggressively rubbing in and out. she suddenly squirted everywhere, but kept touching herself. later that night, jacob came over and asked her to have sex. she agreed and she had another orgasm.
by you'rewelcome69storymaker March 31, 2023
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Masturbate

The act of stroking your hard aroused dick back and forth until it releases cum and you get an orgasm, also a mess.
James saw as Jenny walked into the classroom, her perfect ass shaking up and down gave Jimmy a nervous arousal. He tried getting it down but it only got harder with each touch. Jenny walked over a few desks away from him which made his cock pop right out of his pants. He tried frantically tucking it back in but it was too late as Jenny had seen it. She got closer to him and took off her bra while turning around and placing her ass on James's desk, just inches away from his rock-hard member. At this point he couldn't take it anymore and started to masturbate wildly while rubbing it against Jenny's buttcheeks which revealed a pink thong. By now the entire class had noticed but he couldn't care less and was just a few strokes away from orgasm. Finally he moaned as he released shots upon shots upon shots of hot sperm as the entire class was left astonished. Snapping back to reality he noticed Jenny covering her mouth with her hand in shock while all dressed and never took off anything or was showing her ass and had realized he had imagined the whole thing. He frantically ran for the bathroom as the entire class was left speechless.
by EpicBoi47 October 13, 2022
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whiteboard masturbation

A term sometimes used in certain software engineering circles to refer to the excessive use of things like object-oriented programming, specifically its principle of abstraction, to create highly abstract, polymorphic, incomprehensible and unnecessarily complex systems within software instead of keeping things simple.

This is usually practiced by "engineers" who value the "design" of software more than actually delivering value
to the software's users and/or believe that writing software is akin to designing a car or a building. Buildings, for example, cannot easily be torn down again if some part was constructed incorrectly or contains an error, whereas most software can.

While some may argue that it's prudent to keep one's code "clean" or "extendible" and whatnot, excessive abstraction can have the exact opposite effect: You get an unnecessarily complex mess that is extremely hard to untangle once you actually discover a use case which it didn't account for. The result is a "building" that cannot easily be rebuilt - said whiteboard masturbators will then argue, that "it should've just been designed better in the first place" and that the "model wasn't good enough" and will continue to draw UML diagrams that are of no use apart from impressing the sales department.
"Maybe we should use a visitor pattern to separate this strategy from the concrete adapter that is instantiated by our abstract factory so we can guarantee arbitrary observability throughout our proxied chain of responsibility."
"... listen, at this point it's just whiteboard masturbation. Just keep it simple and write a function."
by Aequitosh February 28, 2024
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masturbed

the feeling of being disturbed while walking in on someone masturbating
just walked in on trevor beating his meat, i’m masturbed.
by July 20, 2022
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Death By Masturbation

Random Person 1 : Did You Hear That Phil Died Due To Masturbating!

Random Person 2 : Death By Masturbation? What A Way To Go Out.
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