Largest of New Zealand's three main islands, known colloquially as "The Mainland". It lies between the North Island, a small overcrowded crime-ridden mishapen
blob of muddy rock also called the "Pig Island", and Stewart Island, the nuggety
wee island of
hard-case good types (about the same size and shape as Tenerife) which hangs off the
bottom of NZ.
The South Island is approximately 1000km long and 250km wide and has a population of just over 1 million.
The South Island is home to New Zealand's best scenery, skiing, mountains, lakes, rivers, hunting,
fishing, 4WD tracks, empty highways, and all the other great things that make the men of a country truly manly.
It also has all New Zealand's best
beer (Speight's, Monteiths, and Canterbury Draught), tastiest steak, and most gorgeous women.
Smoking hot millionairess foreign super model: "I see that even for a New Zealander, you're incredibly manly, hunky, and rugged, but also funny, and sensitive in the old-fashioned non-gay way."
Average South Island bloke: "Well
yeah, I'
m from the South Island."
Foreign etc: (swoons) "Take me to your island paradise and let me have your babies!"
SI
guy (checks out her superb
rack): "Well, maybe. Can you cook?"