The Great Blumpkin

As was foretold by Linus in It's the Great Blumpkin Charlie Brown! It is the king of all blumpkins and can only be had on Halloween night. According to Norse folklore, it is the best blowjob that you can possibly get while sitting on a toilet and taking a shit.

Rick: Yo, Sal, it was halloween last night, did the Great Blumpkin show up?
Sal: Yeah, i had like three calzones and then I wanted to take a shit but she wanted to get kinky. Let's just say The Great Blumpkin arrived on schedule
Rick: Sick
Sal: Ya, totally fuckin sick

by Ichiro Tomlinson May 5, 2010

country blumpkin

a country blumpkin is a variation of the blumpkin, where the recipient of the head giving is sitting in an outhouse instead of a toilet (and the person performing the fellatio is usually a sister or a cousin).

Cletus: "Ellie May, come out to th' shitter 'n give me a country blumpkin!"

Ellie May: "Well shit, I already gave Paw a country blumpkin! You'll have to wait 'til after supper!"

by GoldTeefs September 9, 2006

blumpkin on the spot

This is a variation to the more common term blumpkin. The major difference is that this act of receiving a blowjob while taking a shit takes places inside a port-a-potty.

I got a blumpkin on the spot from that chick at the Tom Petty concert

by Demoneque August 8, 2006

blumpmaster

One who has mastered the art of blumpkin giving

"this girl gave me the best blumpkin, she's like a blumpmaster"

by blumpmaster3000 May 11, 2010

Blumpette

The inverse of the Blumpkin. In a blumpette, oral sex (cunnilingus) is performed on a woman while she sits on a toilet either during, or shortly after, she has defecated. Wiping and flushing before the oral sex begins is known as a "courtesy wipe" and a "courtesy flush". This is known as a "Semi-clean Blumpette". As this removes much of the smell and unpleasantness for the pleasurer it is considered less dirty and less risque. A true "Clean Blumpette" is performed before the woman relieves herself. This is considered the least kinky, as it is more or less normal cunnilingus that happens to take place in the bathroom.

Kay was turned on by the filthiness of the Blumpette, so she made Arnie eat her out while she was still on the toilet.

by Tron Engewar February 3, 2008

Blumpkinetics

The study of the physics involved in giving and receiving blumpkins. This field includes such concepts as oral/anal viscosity and drag analysis, Navier-Stokes Fluid computations, and statistical fecal scattering modeling.

I just completed my Masters of Blumpkinetics at Brown University.

by Dr. Phys January 21, 2010

Porter Blump

A Porter Blump is a delicate, complex, and rather steamy process through which an individual is receiving fellatio from another individual in an outhouse or 'Porter Potty' while taking a dumpasaurus rex. The receiver experiences an unprecedented rush of pleasure from the act of defecating and ejaculating simultaneously. The giver feels similar to Tom Cruise.

Hey mom, u wanna help me out with this porter blump?

I straight up gave that thug a porter blump in the cornfield. --Slutty Ho

That porter blump made me sweat like a lesbian's armpit.

by Rim Job Reagan March 25, 2009