apple wanker

Someone with an unnecessary amount of apple products who loves their apple products more than any other human being and is on the brink of becoming sexually attracted to them.

Guy 1: Did you see Marc flashing his new iPad today
Guy 2: Yeah, I swear that's like his 3rd one this year
Guy 1: What a douche
Guy 2: Yeah, he's such an apple wanker

by papabear20315 September 16, 2012

wankasm

an orgasm that is the result of masturbating aka wanking.

"Dude, that chick is so HOT!"
"Ughuhh I just had a wankasm."

by Wanktastic April 30, 2008

Wankcrupt

A state of mind where you or unable to think of anything to masturbate over. Another way of describing it is having an empty 'Wankbank'.

Looking at a photo/video of Susan Boyle or a man of equal ugliness can cause you to be 'Wankcrupt'.

by Beast Jee August 19, 2010

Wanker's Wrist

Strain of the wrist from jerking it too much, also characterized by excessive muscle growth on one wrist.

"Johnny was hospitalized with wanker's wrist."

by Starnub July 27, 2016

Double Wanker

A person who is such a total and utter wanker, that just calling them a wanker is insufficient.

That guy is so annoying. What a double wanker he is!

by El Woodio Woodio December 2, 2010

Macbook wanker

A person who uses or talks about their macbook at every given opportunity.
May be used with all apple products eg. ipod wanker, ipad wanker, iphone wanker etc.

"look at Sean on his his macbook-again"
"yeah,hes such a macbook wanker"

by zoola-azul January 11, 2012

Gin Wankerdom

the art of dressing a simple gin and tonic with every possible herb known to man and impressing a gin wanker into saying, "can you taste the botanicals in that?" Or "oooohhhhh, the white petal notes are really enhanced with the grapefruit rind"

Shim's gin wankerdom impressed Drew, he'd never had a botanical delight such as this in his life.

by Paulinevic July 28, 2017