Constipation

The state where taking a shit is hard and it hurts like a mother fucker!

Help me god! I CAN'T TAKE A FUCKING SHIT!!!

In German it is called: Farfrompoopin.

by Fart Matser August 24, 2003

Cockstipated

The phenomenon where you cannot, no matter how hard you try, squeeze out one drop of piss, no matter how hard you have to go. Usually in a public facility.

Al came back from the bathroom and said "Holy frozen mixed vegetable cocks!, am i ever Cockstipated again"

by JustincredibleCalgaryFlames February 11, 2008

resting constipation face

Tucker Carlson's grimaced look every night on Fox News.

Tucker Carlson was interviewing Glenn Greenwald on Fixed Noise with resting constipation face as they both slammed Hillary for sending some email.

by Uncle Joosie June 16, 2018

Constituted Authority

Phrase used by a politician to demand respect from protesting citizens when he forgets he got into office through their votes.

Former governor of Oyo(southwestern state in Nigeria) addressed students of Ladoke Akintola University protesting against the continued closure of the university reminding them that he is the "constituted authority"
"Don't you know that I'm the constituted authority"

by Bouf daddy October 9, 2020

Atlanta Urinal & Constipation

Slang term among journalists and others for the Atlanta Journal & Constitution

Have you read the sports page in this morning's Atlanta Urinal & Constipation.

by andy1 September 24, 2006

cuntstipated

Verb: cuntstipate
1. cause to be cuntstipated

Adjective: cuntstipated
1. have difficult, incomplete or infrequent access to female genitals

Stan: Hey Greg, what's your sister doing this weekend?
Greg: Dunno numbnuts, why?
Stan: I have been a bit cuntstipated lately. I was thinking I might try and bum a shag off her.

by Scobar September 22, 2005

Emotional Constipation

Emotional but unable to express it. Either because of 1.) numbness or 2.) it is socially inappropriate to do so.

1. Bob wants to cry but he just can't for some reason, even though he knows it will make him feel better. Guess he's experiencing some emotional constipation.

2. During the funeral, Jerry wanted to erupt into laughter but knew that it would be socially-inappropriate. She was emotionally-constipated.

by cunninleongus February 15, 2010