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Asian parents

The main cause of dispair in most asian teenagers' lives. Here are some major characteristics of asian parents:

1. They still enforce a FUCKING BED TIME for their children, even if they are in high school.

2. They almost never give their children money.

3. Whenever their kid gets a gift or money from someone else, the parents usually gives them to someone else.

4. The only hairstyles allowed for their children are bowl cut and buzz cut.

5. They force their children to do work and chores all day when they just watch asian movie series all day long.

6. The mom often bitch slaps her child when the child did something wrong" ie. spilled a couple of drops of milk on the floor. The dad punches/whacks/shoves intowall until the child starts crying for similar "offenses".

7. Anything lower than an A is considered a failure. If an asian child gets a B or something, he/she expects a beating at home.

8. There is no such thing as a good grade in an asian home.

9. Typical home made asian cuisine is rice, fish, chicken, and vegetables. Except that they are all poorly cooked and taste worse than partially digested milk.

10. If a male asian teenager's parents see him so much as TALKING with a girl, they will accuse him of having sex with her even if he was merely asking her for something like homework.

11. Asian parents often treat their children like they are 5 years old and claim that they do so because they "care" about their children.

12. They usually speak in Engrish.
Examples of asian parents:

1. Dad can I go watch a movie with my friend? It's saturday.

No! It already 10:30! Get to bed NOW!!!

2. Mom can I have $2 for lunch today?

No go earning it yourself.

3. Mom why did you give my gift card away to some random asian dude?

Because you don't are needing it.

4. Dad: I give you haircut now!
Kid: But my hair isn't even long.

Dad: I don't care! You look like girl! Come over here before I take away you TV and compute privalwoeigb *privaleges*awoiwebgio(word to complicated to process)

5. Dad can I go outside for a while? I just finished a whole SAT.

No! Go do another!

6. Self explanatory

7. Kid: Oh fuck I just got an 88 on my math test.

Friend: You're fucked when you get home...

8. Mom can I go hang out with my friends I just got a 100 on my math test!
Why you no get extra credit? Stay home and study so you get extra credit next test.

9. Self explanatory

10. Mom: Who you talking to on phone?

Kid: Nobody
Mom: Let me listen *snatches phone*
Mom: *in phone* HARRO? WHO THIS?
Girl: Ummm... hi
Mom: *hangs up* Why you talk with girl? You get in bed with her?

11. Dad can you please stop peaking into my room?
No. I have to make sure you no using drug or do illegal things.

12.

Put some suntan rotion on you skin so you no get skin cansa!
You must show me compute history every day so i making sure you no looking at irregal web site!
Why you no get 100? When I little kiddie I arways get perfecting test score with extra credit addeding to score!
I hate you! You no never behaving, always thinking about play. Arr you thinks about are eat, sreep, game. Why cannot you act rike the perfected kid that I wanting you to be? You just an razy stupiding kid who cannotingedry act applopliatery and you justing never not no study!!!
by asdfsadfdsfasdsfadfsdafasd August 17, 2009
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Asian parents

Asian parents.... they seem like any other type of parents... don't they? Well, I guess you're wrong. These are the people that start getting a whole load of us Asian kids upset. Here are some things that happened to me:

1. Not letting their kids play real sport, like rugby union, claming that it will affect their studies and it's too dangerous. Eventually, they'll let you play... but you gotta wait forever.

2. If you don't get good grades, you're screwed. They'll hit you and kill you until you promise to study harder for the next exam.

3. They don't care about your physical health and social life, they just care about your studies.

4. They want you to be a doctor/dentist. No way...

5. They want the best school for you... no matter if it's 2 hours away.

6. You got all A's and just one F in your report card. They'll kill you and belt you for that F.

7. Your parents see a girl hug you at the age of 16. They belt you because the girl hugged you.

8. You play games for over one hour. Asian parents will kill you for it.

9. Got into a sporting gala day? Asian parents wont let you go because they're worried about you missing out on a day of school. Gosh damn, it's only ONE DAY!

10. Every evening it's rice, rice, rice and more rice.

11. "Don't watch MTV, study! You're wasting your time on watching uselsss music videos!" says Asian parents.

These are just 11 of thousands of wrong things that Asian parents do to you. From this, it is sensible to infer that a majority of Asian parents are just dickwads.
I got 97% in my test, my Asian parents are going to kill me. - Typical Asian kid

I got a Satisfactory in my report... I'm dead. - Typical Asian kid dictated by Asian parents

Fuck! I'm into summer school, when did I even register? - Asian kid
by Screw Asian Parents June 19, 2008
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Parents

People in your family who specialize in making your life hell. Depending on what kind of parents you have (asian parents are the worst), they can also make sure that you don't have a life, make you study your ass off for no reason, and basically make you a working robot.
Person 1: Hey Jimmy, coming to the party tomorrow. We gonna drink, play video games, dance and all the following above.

Jimmy: Srry guys i can't, my asian parents are making me read books in chinese.

Person 1: Dude you are so uncool.
(Poor Jimmy...)
by ihatelifemorethanyou April 13, 2009
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parents

The people that blame you for everything that goes wrong.
by Sarah July 24, 2004
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Parents

the reason that the teenage years are a living hell. they're only goal in life is to make sure you dont have one. also, to make sure you're childhood is worse than theirs was. and they never have good reasons to back their arguement up.
Me-can i go out with my friends?
Mother-no
Me-why not?
Mother-Because.
*like thats an actual answer.*
by Gerard's Prison Mate September 19, 2005
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Happy Not-A-Parents’ Day

Greeting for couples who survived another month full of unprotected intercourses and have reached a menstral cycle, considering they have achieved this in the past.
Girl: “Babe, we have survived another month of porking without condoms!”
Guy: “Happy Not-A-Parents’ Day my love!”
by kenny_ November 27, 2017
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parents

Noun. The people who brought you into this world, pretend to love you, and then proceed by shitting on your life.
My parents just told me that i have to go home tomorrow.
by Anonymous February 25, 2003
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