What the hedge

Alternative exclamatory phrase / question for what the fuck or what the hell, primarily the latter. Mostly useful for when a substitute swear word is necessary, like around young kids and censor-minded folks, and other such phrases, like what the fudge are considered to be too close to what they're supposed to replace.

"What the hedge was that?" or "What the the hedge was going on back there?

by Duraiken December 01, 2010

nose hedge

nose hairs so plentiful and or long that they can been seen outside the nose.

Honey, it's time to use your nose hair trimmer on your nose hedge!

by joanie v. May 16, 2008

hedge hog

Nick-name of the famous male porn star Ron Jeremy. Assume he was given this nick-name because of his chubby appearance, and his oral skills on the late 70's, early 80's poorly groomed, female genitalia, featured in most of the movies he starred in.

I saw Ron Jeremy in a porno today. The Hedge Hog was gettin' it done.

by J to the A December 21, 2011

hedge maze

A game in which a mouse or other small creature is released unwilling into the twisting maze of another creature's colon.

Man that ferret and I played a long game of hedge maze last night, took it forever to find its way outta my maze.

by The Hooded Pickle April 21, 2009

hedge hog

A man you encourage your daughter to date, wed, or procreate with so you have a hedge fund for your non existent social security. Also known as "Fat F@#$%." Guys that have no other redeeming quality than a paycheck. Also see
"Mr. Collins" from Pride & Prejudice.

I used to be worried about my retirement, until my daughter
found her new hedge hog on e-harmony.

I don't know what I would do without my hedge hog fund... I am so glad I decided to procreate when I was 16, now I can retire at 35.

by floorfly November 30, 2010

Hedge banging

When a man with a beard preforms oral stimulation on a woman/man with an ungroomed pelvic region.

Tiffany thinks hedge banging is the best kind of foreplay.

by LustingNemo August 06, 2017

Misery Hedge

Hedging your emotions by putting a bet on something you really don't want to happen, so at least you get paid if it does.

Dan: "I hope Man-U wins the cup, but I put a misery hedge on Arsenal just in case."
Matt: "How much did you put on Arsenal to win then"
Dan: "only £10. The winnings will be enough to wash away my tears if we lose".

Or

"I really hope Trump doesn't win the next election. As the odds are good, I guess I'll put $20 on him to win as a misery hedge so if he does, at least I get paid"

by S@lty Boi June 12, 2019