Bumper Cocks

Bumper Cock - A cocktail based on white sambuca and whiskey, similar to an Anaconda, but served with soda water and/or fruit juice, can be long or short.

The barman asked me how much soda I wanted in my bumper cocks, I told him to “fill ‘em sky high”.

by Priz-n-wallet January 10, 2020

crockshits

Lots, a lot, loads, tons.

We are going to make crockshits of cash.

by Cydne Washington December 29, 2008

Cockshark

Cockshark is a mythical member of the shark family. It is unique from other sharks in that the forward fifth of its body resembles the head of a circumcised human penis. At this time, two color variations are known to exist. A common pink variety and a rarer day-glo orange morp. The cockshark was created by the Brooklyn, NY street artist team of Enzo and Nio. Used as a sticker campaign by the duo, the cockshark is often placed within a context to draw attention to a greater absurdity which may surround it. The cockshark's normal mythical range would appear to be the New York City area, but some evidence suggests that the species has turned up as far away as London, England, New Zealand, Australia, Iceland and Brazil.

I was walking in Manhattan this morning and damn if I didn't see a school of cocksharks swimming around a Lifetime Network poster.

by CryptozoologicalDude March 28, 2012

cockshot

A rough unit of measurement approximately equal to a standard ejaculation; a few tablespoons.

I'll have a turkey club sandwich with just a cockshot of mayonnaise, please.

by sorak June 7, 2007

cocks breath

when someones breath smells of cocks

''hey man i just came back from a medieval joust and the guy sitting next to me, boy he sure had cocks breath

by Max Lawless January 19, 2008

cocksack

the sack that surrounds the male testicles, or testees, for short.

The cocksack has different names, such as nutsack, sperm pouch, the nut hut, creamery, cum cache, scrotee, or ol' scrote.

When Jimmy didnt have enough money for the tranvestite he picked up on the street (s)he performed the patented tenessee testicle tickler on him. He wont be able to use his cocksack for weeks.

Husband: Hi, honey, how was your uneventful day watching soap operas while I slaved away at work to pay the bills?
Wife: Not bad, that whore you think I dont know about called saying she couldnt make it tonight and little Johnny ruptured his cocksack when he stuck it in the neighbor's fence again.

Husband: Well what can I say? Like father, like son.

by Skidmark McGee January 7, 2011

Fort Clocks

Fort Clocks is the United States' national depository of timepieces. All of the nation's important clocks, watches, sundials, etc. are held in this near impenetrable fortress located in scenic Charleston, West Virginia. Fort Clocks was deliberately not built in Kentucky like the equally important Fort Knox because Kentucky resides in a state that is split between two time zones and is thus inconvenient for a fortress tasked with maintaining the world's most important timepieces. Of the invaluable clocks contained within the cement walls of Fort Clocks include: The World's Fastest Clock, one of those melting clocks Dali used in his paintings, the atomic clock (which runs almost entirely on the cutting age technology of 'atoms'), the pocket watch that Abraham Lincoln was looking at before his unfortunate death, the new year's eve timer that sits below the ball in New York, an hour glass filled entirely with the souls of dead orphans, the world's most inaccurate sundial, and the timer used in the hit show '24'.

Fort Clocks also harbors an elite military force that is responsible for maintaining the natural flow of time by assassinating anyone in research of time travel. This task force is single handedly responsible for why Einstein's "Theory" of Relativity is still just theory.

Built in 1876 to mark the centennial of the signing of the declaration of independence, Fort Clocks boasts a plethora of defensive features. No one can know for sure exactly what those features are since most of Fort Clocks is underground and visitors are not permitted to be within 800 meters of the structure, but rest assured that our nation's clocks under protected with the greatest care and precision.

"I tried to break into Fort Clocks, but I was shot"

"The scientist was about to make an important breakthrough in time travel, but the Fort Clocks Time Patrol showed up and he was shot"

"Eunice said she never heard of Fort Clocks, so she was smacked upside the head."

"Eunice said Fort Clocks doesn't exist, so she was smacked upside the head."

by The Chairman of Fort Clocks March 16, 2008