Skip to main content

Simon Birch 

v. To be struck in the head with a baseball and consequently perish.
Person 1: Did you just see that kid's mom?
Person 2: That dyke just got Simon Birch-ed
Person 1: Are you going to the funeral?
Person 2: No.

---------------------------------------------------

*Woman gets hit in the head with a baseball*
Woman: DOH!
*Woman dies*

Birched.
Simon Birch by chomski January 5, 2012
Simon Birch mug front
Get the Simon Birch mug.
See more merch

Big birch 

Some one bigger than a lil birch
Nick:Krystal's a lil birch

Adrian:no she's a big birch
Big birch by Notlitty September 12, 2016
Related Words

Juno Birch 

A trans British drag queen, whom paints themselves in pastel colors to appear alien like and dresses up in a 50s-60s style. Juno describes her character as an alien trying to fit into human society and doing so by doing typical human things like going to the supermarket, etc. yet still putting her alien spin on it. Juno used to make and sell sculptures of her character to pay off her rent, but then she gained popularity and her career as a performer took off.
1: “Oh look it’s Juno Birch in the produce aisle.”
2: “Yeah, she’s performing at the local bar tonight, what a wacky specimen she is”
Juno Birch by juneau_ June 27, 2021

cranking the birch tree 

Slang for male masturbation, originated in Hanson, Massachusetts.
I walked in the locker room and there was Ben cranking the birch tree to no avail.

Two-Faced Birch

A lovely person, this saying stems from Lewes, England.
Dom: what do you think of her?
Paul: Shes a two-faced birch!
Two-Faced Birch by tommybrookes December 1, 2021

simon birch 

verb. To "simon birch" someone means that you've timed your bounce on a trampoline so that your friend or enemy's knees buckle and fall. The term originates from that weird midget character named simon birch in the 1998 movie of the same title.
"It took a couple of tries, but my babysitter finally simon birched my ass."
simon birch by d'A November 30, 2006

Shaking the Birch 

When someone lays a fart on your leg.
I farted on my friends leg therefore shaking the birch.
Shaking the Birch by Jaycu September 20, 2011