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A mulch is an annoying human being whose presence is simply futile and irrelevant.
*intervenes conversation*

"ugh, go away you mulch"
by A.Tweirdrandomdefinitions November 10, 2019
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The exquisite pairing of cannibus and a shitty rolling tobacco- mixed and finely chopped, which is smoked through a waterpipe. The outcome generally includes mild euphoria and retardation. Generally referred to as a steak and potato dinner.
My god that clown took a huge mulch and is dancing in his boots.
by nanor the clown August 1, 2010
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splattered poo that sticks to the back of the toilet bowl after flushing. Frequently chunky and/or fibrous, thus resembling the landscaping product.
I really mulched the loo after after that vegetarian meal at Carole's.
by senior lipschitz January 29, 2005
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When the dubstep beat is dirtier than dirt and filthier than filth that the bass waves seem to radiate heat and pure stankiness, similar to a large pile of dank mulch.
Dude, that excision beat was so dirty I was just rolling in the mulch
by mulch queen September 15, 2016
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Free coffee, total trash.

Mulch is type of coffee that is purchased from the same vendor that would provide paper products or mechanical supplies.

Mulch is often found burnt in a pot on a gas station warming plate, or percolating indefinitely at a 12 step meeting.
James is in the bathroom, his stomach is churning from all the mulch he drank this morning.
by DB0380 April 21, 2023
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I went to toss my girl's salad and all I ran into some mulch
by tim-tim April 7, 2004
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To destroy or tear apart. Rip things up or make a mess of something. The opposite of cleaning.

Also can mean to fail or do poorly on something.
Wow Mary, you really mulched your bedroom.

Gosh you really mulched that test didn't you?
by Charles Carmichael12 March 2, 2011
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