A mulch is an annoying human being whose presence is simply futile and irrelevant.
*intervenes conversation*

"ugh, go away you mulch"
by A.Tweirdrandomdefinitions November 10, 2019
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The exquisite pairing of cannibus and a shitty rolling tobacco- mixed and finely chopped, which is smoked through a waterpipe. The outcome generally includes mild euphoria and retardation. Generally referred to as a steak and potato dinner.
My god that clown took a huge mulch and is dancing in his boots.
by nanor the clown August 01, 2010
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To destroy or tear apart. Rip things up or make a mess of something. The opposite of cleaning.

Also can mean to fail or do poorly on something.
Wow Mary, you really mulched your bedroom.

Gosh you really mulched that test didn't you?
by Charles Carmichael12 February 14, 2011
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Hot Female, that is so hot you can't stop looking at her!!!
Jennifer Aniston, Mila Kunis, Emma Stone, and Many More Mulch
by Mulchologist69 September 25, 2013
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A sexual act between two lesbians. One lesbian, typically the dominant one in the relationship, proceeds to defecate on the vagina of the other lesbian. The two then proceed to scissor, smearing the fecal matter over both of their vaginas. Oftentimes the two lesbians will not shave their pubic hair for a few weeks prior, building up a bush to place the "mulch" around.
Carrie and Amanda were so busy mulching that they didn't hear the doorbell ringing.
by AnonoJon December 29, 2010
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