There are three types of loners:
1. A person who doesn't know how to connect with others, verbally, or physically, even though they may want to. This is either due to lack of skills, mental social deficiency, or anxiety. The causes of which are myriad.
2. A person who does know how to connect with others, but chooses not to because they view
people as either victims or prey. A predator usually operates best
alone in the
human environment.
3. A person who knows how to connect with others, but others do not know how to reciprocate. This
type of person is usually very gifted intellectually and they understand and even take for granted many concepts,social que's,and knowledge as being "common" and "understood." This accelerated comprehension is beyond the others ability to keep pace and scope, so they lose interest. The "loner" here is not attempting to be offputting, they are simple comprehending the
world through their mind, as the other is through their mind. Neither is wrong, or even
better. It is simply a matter of their being fewer highly intelligent
people, therefore making it difficult for them to connect with others. This
type of loner is the saddest, because they have so much to offer, but no
one can hear them.
Example of 1. A quiet lady who comes into a
bar alone, sits down and orders a drink. She allows others to talk to her, but doesn't know what, when or how to say what they want to express. Unclearness regarding the boundaries and potential reactions of the other is at the
root of the silence.
Example of
2. A quiet male enters a
bar and sits innocuously in the
corner, with a low profile and makes no attempt to stand out in any way. They usually pick a strategically advantageous place to watch and listen to the goings on others. He will be seen regularly and will be known as very polite, quiet and easygoing. He identifies targets based on
whatever is driving his predatory instinct. He then begins to work on a plan to carry out his attack. They are often the last person anyone would suspect, they have no friends, and they
don't talk about themselves at all, beyond the cursory, which is why these types are so very difficult for law enforcement to catch.
Example 3. A man comes into a
bar, he smiles and readily strikes up conversations with others. Within a few minutes the other begins to feel a sense of being "lost" in the conversation. There is a feeling of disconnect. Within a few more minutes the man is left to himself. This cycle will repeat itself unless he becomes intoxicated, then much of the intellect is short circuited and some connectivity can occur. This
type of person can eventually become a type 1 loner because they are at a loss of exactly how to socially communicate more effectively, and so lose interest. Ironically this is due to the difficulty of it. A
loose analogy would be how adult
people lose interest in talking to
children about adult topics and more often vice-versa. The IQ distance can be as
great as a five year old talking to a twenty something, except everyone in this situation, everyone is an adult.