"Haven't you people ever heard of Closing The Goddamn Door, no?"
"Wtf Brendon! We're at a wedding!"
"Oh yes but what a shame, what a shame the poor grooms bride is a whore."
"Oh dear lord..."
A person with a walrus mustache, that flies expensive kites. Also has problems with bathing, and loves larger women. In rare circumstances their teeth are appearing to rot/glow with a yellow light. Generally believed to guard personal beliefs that black people can't swim, and asians love to do math, and backs them up with "statistics".
The deathbed scenes in the novels of Dickens are famously cloying: as Oscar Wilde said, "One would need a heart of stone to read the death of Little Nell without laughing."