beating my meat 

Jerking off
master bating

horny

blue balls

Fuck man im just beating my meat ..

beating my meat by Jason Lazzy January 6, 2017

The Joys of Midwife Beating 

Before you join our little club, you cannot beat midwives with impunity.

If we allow you to join and induct you, you will be granted your Totin Chip, whereby you may beat midwives with impunity. Reducing their faces to rubble and hamburger.

It's a guy thing.

The Joys of Midwife Beating make the world a sunny place!

The Joys of Midwife Beating by Jacques Asse December 28, 2009

Beaning 

When a clitoris, preferably as large as a banana is used in place of a penis or phallic object to pleasure a persons orifice - “to bean” or “beaning” is the act.

“Damn, Hayley gave me a sturdy beaning last night”

Beaning by Satisfyer-Bro2 February 17, 2021

badingadong

used to represent another word; specifically private parts.

When Alica pantsed Joe, the whole french class saw his badingadong.

badingadong by liv g March 23, 2008

beating out a log 

masturbating while pooping

We could hear the porn playing on his computer while he was in the bathroom beating out a log

beating out a log by champ-erbator August 24, 2010

Beating the Mattress 

Masturbation. Basically, if no one else is around, who are you going to beat it to but the mattress?

"John was beating the mattress so hard last night that I heard it through the wall."

"Jessica's out tonight. Guess it's me and the mattress."

Beating the Mattress by Apple-sucker July 26, 2012

Bending Nails

Wasting time, or taking a long time to get prepared.

Especially used if a group of people are waiting a straggler, spending time on a trivial, non vital task.

Hurry up Joe stop bending nails

Bending Nails by Nail Bender November 27, 2012