Guido Moment  

Guido Moment - A moment where ignorance overwhelms the logic of an otherwise rational white guy. To Put it plainly, they act like guidos. Guido Moments are unpredictable, an incident as mild as bumping into someone can quickly involve into stand downs, fake threats, and the ever popular rolling up the sleeves to show off how their "guns". usually this is brought on by roid rage. Guido moments are the third largest killer behind tanning booth accidents and watching Godfather 3.

An exmaple of a Guido moment can be brought on scuffing a shoe. Usually the shoe is bought at Banana Republic or Hollister. Since the price of the shoe is so high, the average white dude ends up going crazy and seeking out the guy who scuffed it. This creates a Guido moment.

I had a Guido moment when some dude scuffed my shoe at a club in Sea Side.

Guido Moment by get me out of jersey February 13, 2008

guido 

cologne reeking, structure wearing, too much gel motherfucker that'll hit on your girlfriend while you're standing right there. he will also start talking to a girl you're talking to like you ane't there- usually has to little fag friends to back is pussy ass up incase you retaliate. he is not necessarily italian as the name might suggest.

i just met this hottie, then some guido steps in and cock blocks

guido by drunkenstein April 16, 2004

guido 

1) a superficial American male, usually from the Tri-State area, pretending to be of Italian descent through the use of some limited slang in whatever dialect was spoken by his supposed ancestors from il Belpaese. Known for his bad music taste, the guido loves greasy hair, wifebeaters, bling bling, tracksuits, and intercourse with guidettes.

2) the guido style is also spotted in the Italian peninsula, particularly amongst wannabe gangsters of the camorra. Their trademarks in Italy are: wifebeaters, tracksuits, cars with strobo lights, a bad command of Italian, being overweight, fur anoraks and - above all - an unhidden love of Gigi D'Alessio's music.

3) a derogatory term for an Italian. For someone who actually is from Italy, being associated with American guidos is one of the worst possible offences.

'That guy must've spent all his money on pimping that piece of trash!'
'That should come to you as no surprise: he's a guido!'

'Are you sure this is Naples? There are so many guidos around it feels like Jersey!'

'Hey dude, in the US we call Italians "guidos".'
'In Italy we call Americans who call us guidos "rednecks".'

guido by vafangù December 27, 2009

Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy 

its my bible.the most genious thing ever written, it pokes fun at humans, their emotions and how they go about life. one of the only humans to actually feature in it is arthur dent, a typical englishman who happened to be good friends with another life form, only finding this out a few minutes before the earth is demolished to create a hyper-space bypass.
after leaving earth, just in time for this to happen, him and his alien friend, ford prefect, set off on an adventure arthur cannot ever quite get the hang of.
the 5 books get surrealer every minute, making the planet earth seem more and more insignificant.
it ponders over life, the universe and everything and even comes up with the most genious answer to everything.
the book also introduces us to one of the best characters in existance, marvin the paranoid android, a robot with the emotions of real people which is usually depression thus creating a depressive robot, coming up with some of the best lines ever written:

"LIFE...........DONT TALK TO ME ABOUT LIFE!!!"
"brain the size of a planet, and here i am, parking cars"

Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy by rathsangatas drink November 1, 2004

guido 

a guido is simply just a douchebag

About 5 guidos at the club tried to get me to sleep with them last night. What douches.

guido by wowthatslame June 12, 2008

guidian 

A young Armenian male residing in the U.S. (mainly in the L.A./Glendale, CA area) who is usually defined by his oily hair, over usage of cologne, cigarette breath, facial hair of some sort, excessive jewelry, jump suit, and a Beemer. These traits are similar to the North East U. S. "guido," who is usually of Italian descent. Hence the word: GUID + IAN, where "guid" is derived from "guido." The "ian" ending comes from the suffix of almost all Armenian last names.

This Beemer full of guidians barely ran me over when I crossed Glendale Ave!

guidian by J. D. Lombardian January 12, 2008

guidodamus 

Based off the comedy great Dave Chappelle's Negrodamus its is the Italian Nostradamus. Said to reside in the somewhere in the eastern United States, its future telling ability is world renowned. It can be identified by its gold chains and potent smell of cologne and over gelled hair. WARNING: Do make eye contact without prior acquittance, if you smell red wine or Peroni on its breath flee ASAP, do not be near its food unarmed. Garlic is not its weakness...its not a vampire...more like the opposite of a vampire...lots of hair and darker...more like a werewolf....but not like a gay twilight vampire....if seen please contact FBI immediately.

HOTLINE CALLER: Guidodamus what will happen to me in my life...?

GUIDODAMUS: Some one will make you an offer you can't refuse....and at some point in your life you will die.

HOTLINE CALLER: Wait what? That is stupid everyone dies, this is bullshit!

GUIDODAMUS: For further clarification we will have to charge you 10 US dollars a minute and 15 for everyone after that.

HOTLINE CALLER: Bahah FUCK THAT!

GUIDODAMUS: Your prophecy has been fulfilled...get em boys.

HOTLINE CALLER: OH sh---(BANG BANG)

GUIDODAMUS: Thank you for calling the guidodamus hot line

guidodamus by therealguidodamus August 18, 2010