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telephony's definitions

aural tampon

Improvised earplugs (or actual ear tampons!) made out of small wads of bungwipe or nasal tissue.
Most frequently used to help prevent an unwelcome ear whipping; can also be used to stem the tide of bright red blood from the ears when one has been exposed to very unpleasant sounds (like rap or metal to somebody who normally listens to adult contemporary, etc.)
{Hoolio}: Hey Husoos!!! What's with the Cleanax in your ears?
{Husoos}: Those are my aural tampons; some bungsnoipe was playing sludge metal music on this big-ass ghetto blaster on the bus I was just on, so I stuck those things in my ears to help stop the damn noise before some other rider beat the living tweedle out of the jerk who was blasting that nasty-azz "music"!

{Dominique}: Hey Hozay, what's with the wads of bungwipe in your ears?
{Hozay}: My ears started to bleed after I watched an R/C helicopter video on YouTube but I didn't know that there was going to be an Anthrax choon accompanying it, so I made me some aural tampons and stuffed those fuckers in my ears!
by Telephony May 20, 2013
mugGet the aural tamponmug.

twerpectomy

A phoney-bologna fake medical procedure sometimes mentioned by the evil babysitter Vicki on the TV cartoon, "Fairly Oddparents".
This procedure is where the patient's tonsils are removed along with his/her will to live.
{Timmy}: I have to go get a tonsillectomy today.
{Vicki}: No Timmy, you're getting a triple twerpectomy!!
by Telephony February 19, 2015
mugGet the twerpectomymug.

piddled-off

When a TV program (such as the news or other current events program) forces heavy censorship, they urge the reporters, narrators, and other crew to say something like piddled-off instead of pissed-off.
{Narrator}:
"In this video, you'll see what happens when one piddled-off idiot takes things way too far."
by Telephony December 16, 2016
mugGet the piddled-offmug.

pisscan

\PIS'kan\ (n.) A somewhat vulgar slang term for a wall-mounted porcelain urinal.
Hey, I need to use the f'ing pisscan before we leave!!!
by Telephony June 22, 2012
mugGet the pisscanmug.
A stronger way of saying the phrase, "fuck you and the horse you rode in on".
{Chris}: Todd, it's your turn to clean the Collecto* out tonight.
{Todd}: Christ, I cleaned the fucking thing last night and the night before! Fuck you and the horse that rode you in!

* The Collecto (abbr. for the Winston CollectraMatic) is the pressurised deep fat fryer used for preparing Original Recipe chicken at Kentucky Fried Chicken.
by Telephony July 29, 2014
mugGet the fuck you and the horse that rode you inmug.

brite

How a faggot would spell the word, "bright".
{Seen on a pee-cee demo by TDM in 2014}

A ? TO EVERYONE: ONLY A FAGGOT WOULD REPLACE "GHT" WITH "TE". .. EX. LIGHT AND LITE. BRIGHT AND BRITE. WHAT IS YOUR GUY'S GAY INCEST WITH THE "TE" COMBO?
by Telephony January 13, 2017
mugGet the britemug.

buttsnoipe

A different way of calling somebody an a$$hole.
Jonathan is such a buttsnoipe for slashing the tires on your bicycle!!!
by Telephony November 20, 2010
mugGet the buttsnoipemug.

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