Definitions by sarcastic
Mad Cow Disease
A fatal brain disease in cattle that is also known as Bovine Spongiform Encephalitis (BSE). It is caused by harmful proteins called prions, and the symptoms are similar to Altzheimers, because the brain basically turns into a useless sponge.
Originally, Mad Cow was a brain disease in sheep called scrapie, but was eventually transferred to cows by some fucking cheapass farmers who saved a few bucks by mixing sheep brains in the cattle feed, knowing damn well that cattle are herbivores. Humans who eat Mad Cow beef develop a similar brain-wasting disease called Creutzfeld-Jakob disease.
As for the Mad Cow scare in the U.S., the cow that was tested positive for the disease was STILL sent to the slaughterhouse and its meat shipped out two weeks before the story made it to the news. And every step now taken to prevent the disease from spreading to humans may be too late because there may have already been hundreds or thousands of Mad Cows that have been slaughtered, chopped up, purchased by consumers, eaten, digested, and metabolized. Oh well. It's only a matter of time before some of us start to drop dead from Mad Cow disease.
Originally, Mad Cow was a brain disease in sheep called scrapie, but was eventually transferred to cows by some fucking cheapass farmers who saved a few bucks by mixing sheep brains in the cattle feed, knowing damn well that cattle are herbivores. Humans who eat Mad Cow beef develop a similar brain-wasting disease called Creutzfeld-Jakob disease.
As for the Mad Cow scare in the U.S., the cow that was tested positive for the disease was STILL sent to the slaughterhouse and its meat shipped out two weeks before the story made it to the news. And every step now taken to prevent the disease from spreading to humans may be too late because there may have already been hundreds or thousands of Mad Cows that have been slaughtered, chopped up, purchased by consumers, eaten, digested, and metabolized. Oh well. It's only a matter of time before some of us start to drop dead from Mad Cow disease.
But on the other hand, Mad Cow disease may also be a hoax because there are also confirmed cases of non-beef eaters, vegetarians, and vegans who have died from diseases that are very similar to Mad Cow.
Mad Cow Disease by sarcastic December 25, 2003
American cheese
Proof that oil and water DO mix after all.
This nasty-tasting, solidified soy oil is used as a substitute for real cheese, which at least has nutrition and is ACTUALLY digestible.
This nasty-tasting, solidified soy oil is used as a substitute for real cheese, which at least has nutrition and is ACTUALLY digestible.
I made the terrible mistake of buying American cheese (hey, it cost half as much as Cheddar). The next day, I woke up with explosive diarrhea because that shit just went right through my digestive tract.
American cheese by sarcastic December 17, 2003
Stupidity
The perpetual trademark of our species. The random and unpredictable state of mind that causes and governs wars, unwanted pregnancies, political actions, divorces, ripoffs, reality TV shows, copycat crimes, cults, self-injury, and lawsuits.
Since the stupid in our midst are breeding uncontrollably while the intelligent minority are dying out, one can easily predict that our stupidity will far outpace our technological progress within a few decades, and propel us back to the Stone Age or extinction with in a few centuries.
Since the stupid in our midst are breeding uncontrollably while the intelligent minority are dying out, one can easily predict that our stupidity will far outpace our technological progress within a few decades, and propel us back to the Stone Age or extinction with in a few centuries.
Jar Jar Binks
He was basically responsible for Emperor Sideous Palpatine's rise to power because in Episode 2, he actually GAVE Palpatine the supreme power of waging war on any planet that dared to challenge the Republic. Unfortunately, in Episode 3, we will then see Palpatine turning against and crushing the Republic with the help of evil Anakin Skywalker/Darth Vader. And we can all thank Jar Jar Binks for that.
Jar Jar Binks by sarcastic December 5, 2003
Napster
Once a free Mp3-trading site, which ACTUALLY had a shitload of excellent-quality independent music, but thanks to the Record Industry Assfuckers of America (RIAA), Napster was quickly killed, and its charred and decomposed corpse was turned into a crappy pay site in 2003 which, unfortunately, doesn't even have any songs that are worth downloading anymore.
the "Napster" that's advertized on TV is not Napster, but some inferior-quality pay-per-download service disguised as Napster.
most extreme elimination challenge
One of Spike TV's best shows. This game show from Japan, poorly dubbed on purpose by sex-starved perverts, features contestants who do the craziest and most dangerous tasks in order to help their team win.
Some of the best parts of the Most Extreme Elimination Challenge show are the Log-Drop, Boulderdash, Sinkers and Floaters, Pole Riders, Domonoes, and Wall Bangers.
most extreme elimination challenge by sarcastic December 4, 2003
Native American
A proud descendent of the first group of humans to settle in the Americas. According to recent archaelogical findings, they migrated from Asia via glacier bridges and sea travel more than 12,000 years ago and within a short time, they branched off into thousands of unique cultures. Sadly, the North American natives were nearly exterminated by greedy and gold-thirsty European settlers who tricked them through the use of treaties, butchered entire cultures in the name of God, raped their women, stole their land, and infected them with smallpox, syphillis, and other deadly diseases. Today, what's left of the North American natives are now either drinking themselves to death on the reservations, or getting their sweet revenge by building casinos.
Although the South American natives were luckier than those of the north, they were mostly converted to Catholicism, forced to speak Spanish, and what little earnings they make are sent to the modern Roman capital known as the Vatican.
Although the South American natives were luckier than those of the north, they were mostly converted to Catholicism, forced to speak Spanish, and what little earnings they make are sent to the modern Roman capital known as the Vatican.
Today, the descendents of the European settlers add insult to injury by honoring a holiday called Thanksgiving, which basically celebrates how their ancestors ass-raped and culled back the once widespread Native American population.
Native American by sarcastic November 27, 2003