robert e. porter's definitions

butt plug

1. A sexual device that is inserted into the rectum and held there by its conical shape. Supposedly to apply pressure to the prostate gland, resulting in more powerful orgasms.

2. A stupid individual, a dolt, a dumbass motherfucker

You no good son of a bitch, you're nothing but a fucking butt plug!

by Robert E. Porter January 10, 2006

quim

The female pudendum (sex organs). Mainly used in Great Britain.

Todd really got a thrill as he prepared to tongue Betsy's quim.

by Robert E. Porter January 21, 2006

clitlicker

(n.) any individual who enjoys licking clitori, human or otherwise.

I knew Janet was a clitlicker when she went down on that heifer's twat.

by Robert E. Porter December 31, 2008

one-eyed mayonnaise launcher

(n.) Same as penis or dick.

Say, Doctor, I've been having an itch in the area of my one-eyed mayonnaise launcher. Might you have a look at it please?

by Robert E. Porter December 31, 2008

cuntitis

(n) Inflamation of the cunt.

My doctor took one look at my crotch and said, "Yep. You've got cuntitis, sweetheart."

by Robert E. Porter January 22, 2006

jizz fizz

(Vulgar slang) - The COCKtail a person performing fellatio receives orally when the one being fellated has an orgasm in their mouth.

Boy, the jizz fizz I got down my throat from sucking his schlong last night was better than drinking a Black Russian!

by Robert E. Porter January 15, 2006

muffdive

(slang) To perform cunnilingus on or to have coitus with a woman.

I bought her a drink, and she said "Let's go to my place and you can muffdive me all night long."

by Robert E. Porter April 3, 2006