goof off

(v.) To slack off by wasting time idely, sometimes through electronic means like video games, or through alcohol, doing absolutely nothing, or sleeping excessively. To goof off is to pass the time through the most unproductive means possible.

I completely goofed off in college, devoting my life to slime volleyball, Soul Calibur 3, and ultimate frisbee instead of academics. Now I'm a level 3 barbarian living in a shack by a tucked away creek in Intercourse, Pennsylvania. It was totally worth it.

I totally goofed off. It's three in the morning and I'm still reading hysterical defs on urbandictionary.com.

To goof off is to live life to the fullest.

by papermachete November 10, 2005

guess what

a good way to get someone to fall into the trap of you making the nonsensical rhyme using the bizarre phrase "chicken butt." good way to get people mad or annoyed, but if they have good humor, amused.

child: guess what.
silly rabbit: what?
child: chicken butt!
silly rabbit: asshole, first you take away my cereal and yogurt, now you make up silly ass rhymes to make me look bad. i'm getting my sawed-off shotgun from my drawer. then let's see who's silly now.

me: guess what.
shazza: what?
me: chicken butt!
shazza: haha, fool me once, shame on you. fool me twice, shame on me.

by papermachete December 28, 2005

sigh

(v.) To exhale depressedly.
(n.) The sound of above. 2. The sound of people having sex.

Their sighs gradually crescendoed until she was screaming as she rode up and down his cock harder and harder.

*Sigh* I'm broke.

He sighed as the leaves fell on his head.

by papermachete December 28, 2005

lax

not very strict or loose

i have lax morals. i fuck around.

by papermachete December 28, 2005

nothing

i. What you can find here between these two arrows ----> <----.

ii. Something important to Ben Kweller.

iii. The opposite of something. Something that does not exist concretely.

Nothing will stop me from getting some booty tonight! Except my face. And my girlfriend.

Ben Kweller: Nothing isn't nothing nothing’s something that’s important to me. That's right. And everyone’s a little nothing that is how it should be. That's right.
That's right - sha sha. sha doo.

Isn't nothing something?

by PaperMachete December 28, 2005

tired as shit

(adj.) To be so tired as to feel like shit and as to feel like you are numb to everything.

Man, I'm so tired as shit, I can't even keep my eyes open; I'm so tired I can't even get turned on by this porno. And I'm usually horny as hell when I'm tired or awake in the slightest sense of the word.

by papermachete November 11, 2005

boring ass fuck

Instead of saying boring as fuck you say boring ass fuck to show that you are so really really really ridiculously bored that you would rather see two or more people ass fuck each other or participate in it than pay attention or do whatever it is that's boring.

A more extreme version of boring ass.

That movie was so boring ass fuck that i started to gouge my eyes out.

by PaperMachete October 26, 2005