father on the feet

(n.) a girl who wears dad shoes.

Fathers on the feet have multiplied since Balenciaga's White Sneakers became trendy in 2017. Also called "Walkathon Patriarchs" because they empower the patriarchy's aesthetics "one step at a time."
Did u see Rebecca's outfit? Absolute father on the feet.
by nolandc September 26, 2019
mugGet the father on the feetmug.

first-wheeling

(n.) to take oneself out on date.

When a couple requests to be alone, a third wheel derails into a first wheel. First-wheeling can be devastating for individuals who dislike their own company.

A good first-wheel could start with laying out a spread of charcuterie, wine, and dark chocolate on the river bank; then unicycling home under the rose-colored sunset. When you get back, to look in the mirror, telling yourself, "my treat," and then blushing, flattered.
Martyn: "Nolan, I am getting tired of you coming on my dinner dates with Phosie."
Nolan: "Ok, I will start first-wheeling and get to know myself better."
Martyn: "Maximal pleb behavior."
by nolandc September 20, 2019
mugGet the first-wheelingmug.

DILB

short for a "Dad I'd Like to Befriend"

Kind, fun, and overweight, DILBs send out family-friendly vibes from all the way across Main Street. One can't help but call him "grill god" and throw a baseball in his direction. Every time a DILB makes a dad joke, a puppy is born in Heaven.
Omg Pete is such a DILB.
by nolandc September 28, 2019
mugGet the DILBmug.

clustertuck

(n.) A group of middle-aged men with tucked-in shirts and hiked-up shorts.

They tend to cluster at social gatherings to vent about their children or work. Most frequently spotted in pockets of Suburban America, the clustertuck is an endangered social unit due to the rise of Millennial fashion trends.
The clustertuck discussed IT solutions at a backyard bbq.
by nolandc August 30, 2019
mugGet the clustertuckmug.

snowflake affair

(n.) A relationship affair that occurs exclusively over Twitter DM.
After participating in the #deportcannibals movement on Twitter, Mike and Jenna entered a snowflake affair.
by nolandc September 08, 2019
mugGet the snowflake affairmug.

Dynadick

(n.) Someone who learned to be rude through their parents.

Traditionally, a Dynadick is an asshole whose father was an asshole, and whose father's father was an asshole also. Thus, a Dynadick is a member of a "Dynasty of Dicks."
Matt: "I went over to Adam's for dinner, and he and his parents scoffed at my body fat throughout the meal."
Chloe: "What a dynadick."
by nolandc September 12, 2019
mugGet the Dynadickmug.

Fleece Navidaddy

The fictitious love interest that you tell your family about when you come home for the holiday season.

Fleece-wearing, dog-rearing, and law degree-bearing, the Fleece Navidaddy is guaranteed to impress the aunts and uncles.
Mother won’t have a Feliz Navidad unless she hears about your Fleece Navidaddy.
by nolandc December 24, 2019
mugGet the Fleece Navidaddymug.